Mom wants her room to be over 80 degrees most of the time. I feel this is unhealthy. Is it?

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Mom wants her room to be over 80 degrees most of the time. I feel this is unhealthy. Is it?

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Mother in law is 97. She lives with us. She is almost always cold even if it's 80 degrees in her room. Constantly telling us to turn up heat. Doesn't believe the temp gauges in her room. Argues and if I put the child lock on she turns it off and then the room can get too cold. What to do?

Family Caregiver Multi-generational Living Senior Health

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Setting the heat at 80 is, yes, likely unhealthy in that it is very drying to everything, including the cillia in the nostrils that protect against germs and such.
The question here is WHY is this happening. In my partner's case it is that he is very very slender. Almost no body fat. And he is cold almost all the time. Long underwear (silk or lightweight wool blends) works, but he is often in a lightweight quilted vest or jacket when I am broiling with the heat at 70. He DID check out if there is a reason, and that's what I will suggest with you. Check for things such as thyroid function, and etc. Speak with your Mom's doc. There may be no choice but to put on a knit hat indoors, ultimately, but you DO need to know there is not a medical reason causing this.

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My late husband too was always cold 365 days of the year and we live in NC where it is warm/hot at least 7-8 months out of the year.
I refused to be hot in my own home(as I am more hot natured), so my husband would wear hoodie sweatshirts and flannel pj pants or sweatpants year round. And when he became bedridden in our living room, I would also just put an extra blanket on him if he complained of being cold.
So I would just have your MIL bundle up in many layers around the house so you all don't have to be dyeing of heat stroke in your own home.

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You can close off the heating vent to her room and let her use a safe floor heater (that turns off if the heater gets hit or kicked). Also, buy her a pair of UGGS, once her feet are baking, she'll warmup. Just for fun, buy her some hand warmers that skiers use. Flannel pajamas may take her over the top (I hate those!).

Let her choose how she wants to live in her own little bubble.

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I believe its due to lack of circulation my Daddy was always cold. Ask your doctor if Alpha Lipoic will help. It is an over the counter nerve supplement. It helped my mom, dad and daughter.

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Most elderly feel cold. I believe it is due to poor circulation. I make sure my mom dresses warmly including a sweater indoors in the winter and that she has a warm comforter at night. I allow her to set the thermostat to 74 or 76, as long as I don't start sweating when sitting with her. At 97 she should be comfortable in her own home and she can afford the extra cost. Fortunately, I have a separate heating system in my house.

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In addition to more layers of clothes, use a space heater in HER room or where she sits to keep the space around her warm and the rest of the house cooler. At 97, I don't imagine she moves much, so it's understandable that she's cold most of the time.

No, it's not unhealthy to have the temp at 80 or higher around her. In tropical areas of the world, it's common to be in 80s or 90s everyday. The bodies adjust.

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Deb4321, welcome to the forum. I remember walking into my parents house and it felt like walking into a hot flash. The thermostat was set at 80, and Mom's hands felt like ice.

Mom would be bundled up wearing thermo under garments, a long sleeve shirt, sweater, cotton scarf around her neck, long pants, knee socks, and shoes.

Dad would be wearing.... well, summer shorts, no shirt, and sandals.

Make sure your Mom has an undershirt/thermo shirt that is tucked into her slacks, tucking the shirt in makes a big difference. Same with wearing pj's, have the top tucked into the pants unless Mom is wearing an undershirt, tuck in the undershirt. Wearing thin cotton socks to bed is also a huge help. Fuzzy socks tend to make it difficult to turn over, it's like being stuck in velcro.

Add to Mom's bedroom one of those long floor heaters which are tip proof. It acts like an electric baseboard. Keep it away from the bedding and curtains. Then you can turn down the heat for the rest of the house, especially at night.

Long time ago our grandmothers use to bring to bed one of those orange hot water bottles. Some elders even wore bed hats to keep warm.

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I'm a cold fish. Need socks most of the year, hot water bottle often & a woolly hat in winter. I'll be that lady cranking the heating up 🙁

I was once dx with Reynard's Disease. I suspect just poor circulation.

I find if I lose heat it's hard to get back - I stay cold for ages. So I need get warm & then KEEP it!

A woolly hat keeps bodyheat in well - has been a life-changer.
Can't recommend more highly.

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Thank you Alvadeer. She has a very nice heater in her room (our master suite) and lives with us. She gets very upset if we don't make it hot enough in her room.and turns it up herself sometimes. I am constantly monitoring to try to keep the temp. around 80 for her. We will ask her Dr again to see if he will test her for thyroid problem or any other. One major problem is she refuses to wear pants or pj bottoms and just wears pj tops and her diaper. Also says more blankets are too weighty. She wears pj bottoms if she is elsewhere in the house. But is aways trying to make it too hot in her room

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Oh geez I couldn't stand the house/room that hot. Yuck. Well, I think we have most of the answer here - no pants! LOL of course she's cold in a top and diaper! Some people just refuse to do reasonable things to help themselves.

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A hat is great because most body heat is lost through the head. Socks, definitely. And then a down comforter - lightweight and VERY warm. And pants if you can manage to convince her. Maybe a heated mattress pad would work but NOT with the down comforter - she would cook.

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HI

My 98yr old FIL is the same.

We bought him a warming pad that's usually used for shoulder and back pain. This warms him up without putting the heating up. It's low cost too.

He also has a Good woolly blanket for his knees.

Hope you manage to sort things out as I Know how stressful it can be trying to reason with them.

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It is difficult. My mom was the same way. When she lived in our house, I was constantly trying to keep her warm without making the house miserable for my husband. I am sure you have tried this but I ended up dressing her in layers. She had a favorite coat and I would wrap up her up even when the house was warm. She was thin and had no fat on her.

We did transition her to an ALF. There, we kept the AC high so that she was more comfortable. She still had the jacket on.

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My mom wears a coat indoors. LBD causes temperature body issues! Let mom have a hot room!!

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Check out thin, light weight, long underwear. My mother and MIL took to them quickly. The silky feel and lack of bulk plus ease of putting on was a selling point.

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She can’t help it.

Her internal thermostat is working differently due to her body function.

She is literally freezing.

Help her by finding comfortable layering clothing. Heated blankets and throws are wonderful as are similarly themed battery operated heated jackets.

Let her be comfortable.

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I haven’t known anyone over the age of 80 that has the room less than 80 degrees if they have control of the thermostat on the wall .

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I am 85, keep my heat at 70 most of the time, sometime I run it up to 72. Always wear warm clothing, jogging jacket and I am still cold but natural gas has gotten so expensive can’t afford to keep really warm. I am sure it’s an age thing as now the summers don’t feel as hot. I weigh 103 so not any fat on this old body. My hand are only really warm when I wash dishes in hot water! Lol

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As a person ages, and health problems become an issue circulation to the extremities diminishes. So hands and feet feel colder, arms and legs as well.
A few things you can try.
Warmer clothing. Polar fleece tops and pants. Oddly they keep you warmer without making you sweat and without the added weight of some other fabrics. And if the fabric gets wet (accident or a spill) it does not absorb the liquid as rapidly.

A hat. A knit cap or baseball cap will help the head retain warmth.

A lap blanket.

Place an electric space heater in her room. Make sure it is secure and away from any window treatments, bedding, clothing. You could put it on a timer if you want so it goes off after she is asleep and comes on as she wakes.
Many electric blankets have timers on them and will shut off after a while and do not have the electric blanket in contact with skin.
BUT do NOT use an electric heating pad if she has an neuropathy (a friends husband badly burned his legs because he could not feel the heat)

the high temp is not "dangerous" or "unhealthy" for her, she really is cold it is due to her ages, her circulation, underlying medical conditions and possibly even medication side effects.

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WARNING . My Mom wore the polar fleece tops and pants . There is a downside to that it doesn’t breathe . So she would sweat. She had dementia and did not know she was sweating , nor did she shower often . She stunk and got fungal rashes under large breasts , abdominal folds and groin . Took away her fleece and just got her regular Hanes sweatpants and tops .

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I live in a senior apartment. We have not turned the heat on in our unit since we moved in. It still runs at 75 degrees all the time because the building is so warm. In fact, on the few occasions it falls to 73, my husband (88) complains of the cold! The younger employees are always in summer clothes.Must be why old folks in novels were always in a nook by the large kitchen fire.

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OP has commented that the MIL refuses to wear pants. Big part of the problem. Brrr!

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I agree with a space heater, perhaps one with its own thermostat. Maybe a humidifier so she doesn't dry out like a prune.

After being "the hot one" of the two of us, my 65-yr old husband has started creeping up the temp in our home during the day in the winter. It's now at 72 degrees. He still wears multiple layers of clothes and complains about being cold. He has a space heater in his home office. He is a perfectly healthy man who still plays hockey 3 mornings a week, kite ski's on our lake on weekends, and is not skinny by any means. So, it must be a circulatiion or internal thermostat issue.

Maybe consider silk long johns for your Mom... we both have a set. Very lightweight and comfortable.

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My ex-MIL has literally isolated herself from family and friends because of the heat issues. We live in southern Vermont. She keeps her thermostat at 80 and has a wood stove at the same time. None of her grandchildren or children who live in the same town visit because of the heat. I am her ex-SIL and do most everything that gets done. I hate the heat and always wear gym shorts and t-shirt when I go over there. She's a difficult woman and refuses to consider the comfort of others.

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It’s a normal part of aging period. If she is a thin woman, maybe a skull hat along with thicker clothing MAY help.

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Have her iron level checked

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My mother is 98 and in hospice in AL. It is about 78 in the room and she says it is cold-- and I am sweating. It is anatomy/ biology for the age.
Lots of good suggestions here but mine is: Electric blankets are a miracle. They are very light. Get an electric lap blanket, and electric blanket for her bed (with a quilt / light blanket over it to retain heat).
She will still complain though... you are amazing for taking her into your home.

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We had an electric blanket catch on fire at 3 a.m. Just wear a pair of socks to bed.

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We always put a heater in my Grandmother’s room.

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I can totally relate. I can’t stand to be in the house for very long because it is burning up and she’s freezing. When I am chauffeur, thank goodness there are dual controls in the car. She loves her heated seats. I’m thankful for the suggestions about clothing.

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It's not unhealthy for her. She is cold. I've been that way most of my life. I could probably manage nearly all year long without an AC (and I'm in Texas!). To go to any of my family's homes is literally painful for me. AC temps are kept anywhere from 60-68. Mind you they all have blankets on every chair and couch and cover up and seems nuts to me. Raise the temp a little and leave the blanket off. I moved in with my parent and where temp was concerned, we were two peas in a pod. When others were going to visit, I adjusted the temp for them so they didn't sweat, but turned it back up as soon as they were out the door. And, yes, when I do visit family I take enough layers to help myself out...and use their blankets.

My ac went out yesterday and temp hung about 81 all day. I plugged in a fan and put on short sleeves. I was good. If you can't adjust mom's room only, get her a heated lap throw (like a heating blanket, but smaller). I kept one of those in my office for years and wrapped up each time I sat down. You could also use one of those elec bed pads that go under the sheet and place it on her chair. Definitely put a sheet or something over it and turn it to low setting. Get her long sleeved tops or PJ tops to keep draft off her arms. If she will wear a light weight knit cap, that helps a lot to keep heat from leaving your body.

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As long as the entire house isnt set at 80 let her swelter in her room. But i would put my foot down if she wants the entire house that hot. Also make her pay for the electricity to keep it that hot.

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To suggest to another person whose circumstances you don't know, that they should 'make her pay' is quite often, or more often than not, not an option for many of us here. Poster's MIL is 97. Practically speaking, not many 97 year-olds in the U.S. have disposable income.

There comes an inevitable time in the course of caretaking where money isn't the solution, even if it happens to be there. Also, that the entire concept of 'practical', isn't an option any longer.

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I'm 70 and I've always preferred the cold. I sleep with the window opened in the winter, even when it snows, and when it's a bit windy too. On the other hand, I also love blasting hot showers and hot jetted tubs. I dislike hot rooms. Does your MIL take blood thinning medication?

Anyway, what about a battery powered heated vest or jacket for MIL?

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She doesn't take any blood thinners only water pills sometimes and potassium supplement. Won't wear any extra clothing. Only top with diaper unless she is coming out of her room to be with us. Refuses clothing and extra blankets. Says they are too cumbersome. She's really stubborn.

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Deb4321: Provides sweaters and blankets for your mother in law. Perchance is she on blood thinners that make her cold?

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Well it certainly isn’t unhealthy. It can be expensive depending on where you live. I like my house at 80 degrees or maybe high 70s, personally. What is your concern? The expense? That you like your house cooler?

One thing you can do if you like to keep your house colder than she does is get her a heater for just her room.

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She does have her own heater in her room. Plenty of blankets. No problem with the expense. The trouble is she keeps turning up too high and will make it 86 in there and then complain it is too hot. I turn it down and then she keeps fooling with it. Has broken several thermostats.

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Mom wants her room to be over 80 degrees most of the time. I feel this is unhealthy. Is it?

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