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My mom has been in and out of hospitals several times this year. Most recently discharged for the second time from a psychiatric hospital. She does not want to live alone and is unable to care for her house any longer. She has had 3 leg surgeries this year and has difficulty walking up and down stairs. She mention going into a nursing home because she cannot afford in-home care. I work full time and am unable to be there as much as she would need. She wants to sell her home, but it needs new electric, is outdated in addition to other repairs. So, really not sure what she would get for it. She had new siding put on a few years ago and took out a second mortgage for that so she owes. I don't even know where to begin. She really needs help with making sure she takes all of her medications, especially now that they've added 4 new psych meds. Any advise is welcomed and appreciated.

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i don't have advice on where to start but just wanted to say she'll get more for the house now in this hot market than at any other time, now is definitely the time to sell! and bless her heart for taking the biggest burden off of you by actually WANTING to be in a nursing home. most of us have the horrible burden of parents who refuse and guilt-trip and only go kicking and screaming even though it's what's best for them. i guess a good place to start though is to apply for medicaid and get that process going because there can be a long wait.
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Put her in the best nursing home your community has to offer.
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Your best and easiest way to proceed, given Mom's special needs, is next hospitalization speak with the social workers about her options for care in facility. They will be best guides going forward. I hope others have some options or advice for you. And I wish you the best.
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She starts by knowing if she can afford to move somewhere else. A second mortgage makes it unlikely that selling her home will help her afford AL. Medicaid in most states only pays for LTC, and one must be assessed to medically need it. The one must then qualify financially as well.

So, I'd gather all her most recent statements of whatever assets she has and take it to an estate planner and/or a Medicaid Planner. You can't make a plan without knowing where she stands financially.

Then, she can explore options: maybe a senior group home scenio will be more affordable, or she pays you (please have a written contract), etc. Others on this forum will make more suggestions. Most of all, make sure she assigns a DPoA, has an Advance Healthcare Directive, and a Will. Also understand that most states' Medicaid financial app has a 5-year look-back period, so how she manages her assets will be scrutinized and both of you need to know what the rules and expectations are. I wish you much success in finding a solution that meets her needs!
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