Mom won't get out of bed and will even lay in her pee. Any ideas?

drat55: Perhaps it's time for hospice.

AlvaDeer: Absolutely agree!!!

There are many different diapers to try. All do of course have urine in them, and urine will break down the skin of an elder this age quite quickly.

I would consider the Purewick System. Look it up online. I believe that with the not wanting to move at all this may work for your Mom.

I would also consider Hospice now.
You mother is done with it. She wishes to go to the peace of death. I would allow her to do so without worrying now about food and mobility. This is the case with many elders. It is difficult for the young to understand. But it isn't unusual at all.

Discuss Hospice with her doc and make a decision for that or for palliative care. I wish you the very best. This is tragic to see, but it is where we all get to inevitably if we live long enough.

It’s time for hospice

Momma was/is incontinent when she lived in her house we found out. She would not wear depends but wore those period pads. She needed something thicker. I tried to talk to her about it but she did not want to listen to me. She would have an accident in her bed and instead of changing her sheets or asking somebody to help her she would just lay down a hand towel and get right back on top of it. There was one time she had a number 2 accident in her bed and my husband and I just happened to be over there. It was really bad. All the way down the mattress pad, carpet and to the bathroom. She stopped up the toilet which my husband had to unstop and I had to strip everything off her bed and wash. Went to buy her a waterproof sheet for her bed. When she went into assisted living I guess the aides talked her into wearing depends.

Yeah, Drat. She's over it. She wants to go now.
My dad talked to me so at length about being exhausted with life. And he admitted he had a lucky and a wonderful life. My Mom and my Dad's love story the greatest outside Romeo and Juliet (and who knew what a life of family would have wrought THEM) I ever knew.

But at mid 90s he said he just wanted the last long nap. He was so very tired. He didn't want to be messed with. Just wanted to be allowed to go to peace.

Do try Hospice. They will know the best way to keep skin intact and to protect her, to suggest what will work best. I am so sorry. This is tough to see, but sometimes we just long for peace and an end to the long journey when we can no longer play it backward the other way, getting younger by the day.

Good luck. I hope you will have hospice care for the end.

Mom needs a nursing home SNF where they will give incontinence care more often ..

She also needs regular adult diapers , not pull up type Depends .

Alf is no longer a high enough level of care for Mom .

Time for nursing home plus hospice care. I don't blame her either. She's at the end of the road and she's exhausted. She just wants to sleep. And for us it is now to get in Hospice, keep her clean and free of sores, medicate her to comfort and allow her to pass. She's tired. She has a right to be kept comfortable in this her last time. You cannot know all the things of an ENTIRE LIFETIME that are roving now through her head. They say we can relive a lifetime. This is her time to review her life, be kept in loving care, and be comforted as she approaches the end. Allow her all the dignity possible at this time, all of the grace, all of the honor for a long lived life.