My mother is ill with a variety of illnesses ranging from arthritis to diabetes to heart disease. When my husband and I are at work and my children are at school, it's difficult to keep track of how she's doing. I've considered hiring a visiting nurse, but I have trust issues with that. I call periodically and when the kids are home from school, it's easy for them to monitor her. What are some suggestions on what to do in a situation like this?
Estelle please don't continue to beat yourself up. I am sure your mother would not blame you in any way and loved you dearly while she was alive for the wonderful are and companionship you gave her
Take care of you and your Mom - Estelle
Could you tell me how your mom acted when she got the one that was fatal. I worry about not knowing the signs. Hugs
do, so I still worked
I felt I was accomplishing it all, but now feel unbearable
Also, preparing things before hand was another great idea. Thank you all for these responses. I'm going to tie together the bits and pieces that will work best for my mom.
Probably the most valuable service is a personal care aid that will come to the home daily - maybe mid-day. Our company offers care for just 3 hours so it is very affordable and brings a lot of peace of mind. We have engaged one of our personal care aids for 5 hours a day to come to our home for my 93 yo mother in law. She makes her breakfast and lunch, does light housekeeping, shopping, companionship, bathing, etc. She notifies us if there is anything unusual. Major peace of mind and much less cost than an assisted living for now. Just be sure to find a reputable company.
I plan to call his doctor's office Monday to ask for more home aid/nursing since he also does not wash with soap. This led to bedsores before.
Oh, and he lies to me even about simple things.
in my experience with monitoring my mom, I always prepared her meals,breakfast lunch and dinner the day before. her meds in med boxes. I always made sure wastebaskets were emptied each night. That way I knew what was thrown out. I only asked her to eAt her breakfast, washing dishes were not necessary. She lived in a senior housing apartment. a neighbor would look in on her. Eventually I hired my friend to stay with her a specific time of the day. Like lunch and dinner. Also, if you decide for a visiting nurse,primary dr writes up an order for a nurse to visit. it would occur for my mom after a hospital stay. When you invite help into your home sombody needs to be there to leave that trusted adult in your home.
I was there for the initial visit, and the nurse would call to let my mom know what time she was comming. She did well with that. Then I would ask the nurse to contact you or write her notes in a journal of her visit. I did the same with my hired friend. I had a journal of all that was done during her visit. What she ate, drank, activities, meds. Mood, bathroom events etc. It was so helpful.
Hope this helps.
Take care
Equinox