In my over-55 community, many people seem to have never learned that they should cover their mouths and noses if they sneeze or cough. It's cough-cough here, cough-cough there, here a cough, there a cough, everywhere a cough-cough. They explode spit, phlegm, the lining of their esophagus, whatever, right out into the air that others breathe. I know we all learned proper sneeze-and-cough skills in elementary school to prevent the spread of disease. What happened that these folks think it's okay to spritz and spray?
Respectfully, this comment may mean you don't fully understand what dementia does to a person. They lose reason and logic, lose empathy for others, lose memory, lose social awareness, lose filters, lose sense of time and place, etc. They only lose, they don't gain or retain.
Reminding someone only works if your brain is able to retain this info (and the person has motivation for social adjustment). None of this happens with dementia. The only person who can willfully change is the person without dementia. Can the OP reminder her? Sure, but it will be pointless. She'll have to do it every time it happens. Which will probably eventually be with every mouthful. I personally would save my mental and emotional energy for the other parts of the caregiving.
I purchased a set of hankies for my mom because she was using up toilet paper for blowing her nose like crazy! It didn’t work. I put a note next to the toilet roll in the bathroom to remind her to use a hanky instead. I quickly learned she is either ignoring or cannot comprehend what the note is for. Her long term habit is to grab a length of TP for her nose. Oh well.
It may not be rude, but it certainly is pointless as your MIL's brain is now permanently broken and she will never retain what you say/ask anyway. You may as well just get used to it, as I'm sure there are many worse things yet to come. Hopefully she's not living with you and you only have to tolerate her behavior on occasion.
She won't remember. I'm sure she did it before she had dementia. I learned a lot from watching Teepa Snow videos on YouTube. She's an expert on dementia and caregiving and has excellent tips on how to better engage with our LOs with dementia for more productive and peaceful interactions.
The only person who can change now is you, not her.
Reminding someone only works if your brain is able to retain this info (and the person has motivation for social adjustment). None of this happens with dementia. The only person who can willfully change is the person without dementia. Can the OP reminder her? Sure, but it will be pointless. She'll have to do it every time it happens. Which will probably eventually be with every mouthful. I personally would save my mental and emotional energy for the other parts of the caregiving.
Otherwise, stand away and off center when dealing with her.
You may as well just get used to it, as I'm sure there are many worse things yet to come.
Hopefully she's not living with you and you only have to tolerate her behavior on occasion.
The only person who can change now is you, not her.