Mother's Day. Any suggestions?

It’s not “wrong”, but unless feeling as you do actually makes you feel better, why take your valuable time and waste it on her?

What do you need to do to make all or part of your Mother’s Day YOURS? You’ll have to think of some tweaks to what you’ve done in the past, but if you NEED a holiday you have the absolute right to have it.

Simplify or cancel brunch, do two short visits to the AL instead of one longer one, plan a picnic or barbecue, and I bet you can think of some others that will allow you to find time that for you and those grands.

And really, Mother’s Day should be any day you can spend with your grands, so could another day, maybe the Sunday after, become “grandmaofeight’s SUPER SPECIAL DAY? Or anything that could be fun for you AND THEM?

YOU DESERVE THIS. Vent all you want, then make a plan!

You do NOT have to responsible for anything that you don't enjoy. Just say no. Walk away. Cancel. If it's important enough to anyone else, they can pick up the ball. They don't have to like it but you need to follow your heart and do what YOU want to do.

One day, yet so many Mothers.

Your Mother, you are a Mother, your daughters or DIL's now Mothers too?

I think spread the love out.
Like with birthdays where you can have 'your day' on your actualy day, or on another day if it is more convenient.

Arrange what special time or meal you see your Mom, what special time/meal you see your children, also what time they carve out for their own immediate family. Doesn't have to all be squeezed into one day does it?

Personally, in past years I also have thought what about my own Mother's Day? But this year I plan to have a dinner out on a Thursday or something different instead. Not going to be told when to celebrate by some card manufacturing company.

We celebrate MD on the Sunday before. No big deal. MD is too crowded and noisy to go out that day.

You do know you don’t have to do anything you don’t want to do and don’t have to provide an explanation for your decision, don’t you? It’s one of the great things about being an adult and it took me way too long to learn. I’m not a fan of Mother’s Day, even before I lost my mother, but even more so now, so I don’t do anything and my family knows it. I hope you’ll have the day you choose, one that brings you peace

I am a 60-year-old male (my pronouns are guy and man) and have no children, but I own a boutique home healthcare agency in Boca Raton, FL so I will speak from that perspective...

Anyone who is a caregiver for their adult parents is a hero! I always remind the children of my clients that they didn't come with an instruction book when they were born and their parents didn't write one to cover their old age. Taking care of your parents is like trying to build an airplane while it's already in the air - or having to take the test without reading the study guide...

Mother's Day should be (and can be) celebrated 365 days a year. Just because the greeting card company says it's one Sunday doesn't mean you can't have a Mother's Day with your mom, a Grandma's Day with the grandkids, and a "Me Day" at the spa...

You don't need to wait until May to honor your mother. Bring her flowers, buy her a gift, give her a hug just "because it's Tuesday". Acknowledge her and thank her for the profound privilege it has been to be her child. Reminisce with her and let her know she "got her job done"! That's the greatest compliment you could give a parent and what they are waiting to hear!

I promise if you begin to do that, your job as a caregiver will get 10 times more meaningful and fulfilling, and 10 times easier!!!

As for your sister, she's not going to change. The easiest way to handle her is simply to say, in a straight and matter-of-fact way, "I'm doing "X". I need you to do "Y", then shut up and listen.

If she says no, ask her to send you a check to cover the cost of hiring someone to do "Y". Don't bring any drama, upset, or judgment to the conversation. If she says no, just keep asking until she says yes or starts writing checks...

Spend it with your Mom on Saturday, and enjoy Sunday with your family.

You can ask your sisters to step up this Mother's Day too - sometimes we complain but do not ask specifically for the favor we want. It's worth a try.

I agree with the group--go have your day, do a little something sweet for mom either before or after. One person cannot always be the go-to for every holiday.
Also, see if your sisters will divvy up the holidays so the burden doesn't fall on you. Some people won't offer to help, either because they're dense or just trying to skate by, but will if they're told that there needs to be more buy-in.
If they can't do the holidays, then there's no rule that says it has to be you for every single one-pick the ones you want to do with your mom and do something for yourself on the other ones.

I must be a bad daughter. I don't think I've ever celebrated Mother's Day with my own mother on the day, once I became a mother myself (maybe even once I married?). I certainly won't deny the possibility. But I can't be the only one. My mom's birthday is also in May, right before Mother's Day, and I usually pick a day in between to bring presents and maybe take her to lunch. She's never complained. She does have two sons and grandchildren who live locally and I know they acknowledge these days in some way as well. But honestly, I don't know exactly what happens on the day itself. My parents were divorced, so maybe Mom is just used to celebrating holidays on alternate days sometimes.

All this is to say, why does it have to be THIS day? Can you see your mom on Saturday and do something with your grandchildren on Sunday, or vice versa? I understand the stress and bother of always having to make these days special for everyone, I guess I've always chalked that up to being a woman with a family. But do take the time to do what brings you joy! Happy Mother's Day to you.

I deal with this all the time. My brother expects me to plan, cook, transport mom to and fro and he just shows up with a big ass card and some cheap flowers from the grocery and everyone swoons.

You need to celebrate mothers day with your mom the day before or the weekend before. Take a picnic basket brunch to her and have a little party with just the two of you. Then on mothers day, have your own day. When the family (your sister) contacts you to say "hey what is the plan for mom on mothers day?" just tell her you have already celebrated with her, so whatever she chooses to do with her is her business.