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My daughter has been helping take care of me for the past 4 yrs. even when I was married because HE did nothing!! She is struggling to help me and her own family. I have been trying for several months to find funding for her and I keep getting TOO MUCH INFORMATION and not direct help or answers. She has been qualified thru a organization called C.H.A.M.P.S but was told that she has to have an Adult Caregiver Case Manager(?) which is where I am supposed to request this thru Medicaid which apparently, I am not qualified for. So where can I go now? I just need to get a case manager and she can get paid. What can I do?

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Why not take care of yourself? Let you daughter take care of her family?

Carpel can be taken care of, it is not a death sentence.

I cannot believe what I have read, your daughter is entitled to her own life, there is some real codependency going on here.
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I just researched C.H.A.M.P.S

https://www.michigan.gov › champs-a
Community Health Automated Medicaid Processing System (CHAMPS) - State of Michigan

It seems to be run by Michigan Medicaid. If so, I would think the program would assign a case manager. If not, then take the information received to your County Social Services and ask to talk to a Medicaid caseworker and the reason why.
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I think this is daughter talking in 3rd party. Makes it very confusing.

At 66 what kind of help does Mom need? What type of things do you do for her.

"I check on my mother after her working a half-day" So Mom can work. You can have surgery for Carpal tunnel and therapy afterwards. Why hasn't she done this?
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This can't be a real question.

What kind of grandmother would think her needs are more important then a 3 year old?

If you can work part-time, you can take care of your own needs. Buy small pans, think about your daughter and grandchildren for a change.
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Heres an idea stop living in independent living and pretending you are independent because clearly you are not when your daughter is doing everything for you.

Maybe you should be asking what are the services and solutions you can find to help yourself rather than relie on your daughter so much. She cannot take care of you full time and raise her own family. Something has got to give.
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I don't know the answer but i'm writing to tell you good luck and that this seems like a terrible struggle. so sorry~!!! someone will tell you what to do. <3
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This user name, jackieberry, is a profile that's set up as a daughter caring for her mother.

It would seem that this post is written as the mother on behalf of the daughter.

Two different people should not be using the same profile b/c it makes things confusing for we who are commenting and trying to get a picture of what's happening.

From this profile:
I am caring for my mother Jacqualyn, who is 66 years old, living in independent living with age-related decline and other.

About Me:
I am her only daughter and I have always taken care of her when she was sick or not able to get around. I love her and want her to have the best. caregiver ...ME. I have 4 children ages 24, 14, 11, and 3. two boys two girls. The oldest one works 3rd shift and when school is out watches the younger ones while I check on my mother after her working a half-day.. She has CARPEL TUNNEL real bad and cant grasp pots and pans or maneuver objects for her comfort\. I am 44 and healthy and very capable of helping my mother.

To the mother: your daughter has young children to care for; how is she not going to struggle to take care of YOU and her children along with a job of her own if she gets paid by Medicaid?? Money doesn't put more hours in the day with which to get all of these things done; your daughter's oldest is already babysitting for her AFTER working a 3rd shift job so she can 'look after you.' Doesn't sound fair to me to place this burden on the backs of children b/c you have 'carpal tunnel real bad.' I have arthritis in my lower back to the point I can hardly walk half the time, yet never call on my children OR my husband to 'care for me' in any way, shape or form. Nobody owes me anything in life, in reality.

Why don't you look into having that situation surgically repaired so you can care for yourself independently now? You would certainly NOT qualify for Medicaid based on carpal tunnel!!!

Here is a link to the first post written by the daughter, it sounds like, asking how she can 'apply to be a caregiver' for mother.

https://www.agingcare.com/questions/how-do-i-apply-to-be-a-caregiver-for-my-mother-475191.htm?orderby=recent

Read the comments, mother. They are all pretty much saying that your daughter's first priority needs to be to her FAMILY and children, not a young mother who has carpal tunnel in her wrists.

Sorry but it sounds like you are asking way too much from your daughter and looking to have her get paid by the taxpayers in addition! Pay her yourself if you don't qualify for Medicaid, meaning you have too much money TO qualify, but better yet, get your carpal tunnel surgically fixed and be your own caretaker. That would be your best option for ALL concerned.

Good luck
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Beatty Jul 2022
I think you got it. The Daughter-Mother are so entwined they are posting as ONE person.

This happens with long-term caregiving - the needs & responsibilities get merged together. Trouble is, the needs of one can overwhelm the other..

In this case the Daughter's life is being absorbed - heading to BOTH living Mother's life 100%.

I think this is behind the confusion.
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Have you applied for Community Medicaid and been turned down?
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This is very confusing. Isn’t it your mother who needs to qualify for Medicaid, not you?
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