So my husband passed away and I didn’t find out until after he was buried I received a phone call about friend a month and a half after he passed telling me he had been shot. At the time we had split up for about 6 months he moved to California where he was from. I freaked out of course.
Drove to his aunts house to confirm the news was true. She told me that his family spoke to me and I said I didn’t care (not true) The next day I drove to California and went straight to the funeral home and at that time I was told by the funeral home that he was not married so I pulled out my marriage certificate to prove who I am and they apologized to me a million times and told me his family said he was not married and if they would have known they would have found me. I have a child by this man and I’m traumatized for life.
I wasn’t thinking about suing them at the time because I was suffering from depression for a long time
My question is do I have a lawsuit?
If your child is under 18, he is entitled to SS thru your husband. You maybe entitled to the $250+ death benefit. If no will, you and son are entitled to any assets he had. I don't think probate can be closed for a certain amount of months. Have to make sure of debts. Consult with a lawyer.
I have looked up people on the internet. I have been able to see everywhere where they have lived and who lived/lives in the house. Even who is related? I have been able to take that info put it in search and find exact addresses and phone#s. I did not need to pay for the info.
But first, you need to determine if there was a will, or if he died intestate (i.e., w/o a will), and if the latter, you'll then need to determine (a) what rights a separated wife has when her husband dies under the CA laws and (b) if your husband had any assets.
(a) This is the legislative site for intestacy laws in CA:
https://leginfo.legislature.ca.gov/faces/codes_displayText.xhtml?lawCode=PROB&division=6.&title=&part=2.&chapter=1.&article=
An easier, synopsis of CA intestacy laws:
https://www.nolo.com/legal-encyclopedia/intestate-succession-california.html
(b) You'll need to know what, if any assets, he had. Did you share a house jointly? Any financial accounts? Did he have other assets that weren't shared jointly? If you qualify under these laws, this is when you'll probably need to get an elder law or estate planning attorney involved. This kind of challenge isn't a DIY project.
Maybe your hubs did not want you told? Maybe he told other family members he did not want you knowing what he was up to. Happens with many separations.
Maybe family was simply honoring his wishes? I agree that you should have been contacted. We just do not know the reasoning behind not contacting you. And yes, they could have done it out of pure spite.
I am sorry for your loss.
The only thing they are guilty of is not having the correct information regarding his marital status. That is unfortunate but it isn’t a crime or negligence in any way.
home. I’m going to disagree with the responders encouraging you to sue. First, there’s a missing piece of the puzzle you and everyone else has overlooked and that is WHO was responsible for the death mitigation. You have no basis for a law suit suit against the funeral homes because official notification came from the county coroner and the detectives investigation the case. Your husband was murdered so the coroner/detectives. Are the ones who tracked down his next of kin and made the death notification. Perhaps you should contact the county coroners office to lodge a complaint for not being notified. You may even find you are eligible for a small amount of compensation through the county—most counties in this state have programs that assist crime victims & their families.
if you want to sue your husbands family for pain $ suffering, have you considered that in order to actually collect any money, they have to have the money? Unless they are all extremely wealthy, there’s little chance you will ever collect on a lawsuit. If these are average joes living paycheck to paycheck like a lot of Californians, is a civil suit really worth putting yourself through? Just a thought but perhaps you could sue and instead of asking for money for pain & suffering, why not ask for the family to pay to have his body relocated?
and what about the person who is ultimately responsible for all of this? Why not file a civil suit against the killer?
For you to be entitled to compensation, somebody has to have owed you a duty of care and failed to fulfil it. Your husband's family didn't owe you any duty of care. What are you going to sue them for? For lying to the funeral home? You'd been estranged for six months. As far as they were concerned, the marriage was over and he had no wife. You'll have a hard time proving that they should have known better. And probably a really, really miserable and even more traumatic time arguing the full history in court.
How old is your child?
The family advised the funeral home and the morgue that he was not married .. The funeral home told me they locate lost family members if they had known they would have found me ... The entire situation was not only hurtful and mean but embarrassing to myself and our child ... They did ask me if I wanted to move his body but I couldn’t
I had to see a therapist for awhile after and still suffering to this day
my son and I were robbed of our goodbyes and for that I will never be the same and neither will our son
yes they did catch the person who killed him
it was my duty as a wife to bury my husband no amount of money can bring him back but I do think someone should pay for the long term pain they have caused my son and I
I will seek legal advise
thank you for your feedback
you can’t make this stuff up 😢
I can't imagine how hurtful this must be, but I think your course of action now should be as BluefinSpirit and MAC stated. If there were any final documents, the family might be closing you out of those as well. That could be grounds for suit, if in fact you were a beneficiary but were cheated out of it.
Were you able to get any information on the shooting from the local or state police?
So sorry for your loss!!!
It's possible you have a case for pain and suffering, I suppose; but, honestly, your bigger battle may be with the distribution of your husband's estate. I would suggest you grieve the loss of your husband, but get back at the family by making sure you get everything you're entitled to. Unless your husband left specific instructions in a prenup, will, or trust, his assets should automatically become yours. If your husband's family wouldn't tell you about his death, do you really think they're going to be truthful about his assets? Get all your documents in order and get a lawyer.
Wishing you the best!
This is a question you should ask at forum.freeadvice.com. There are a lawyers that respond there.
as a general rule you need to be able to show damages, and in the case of civil court, that means monetary damages.
are you or your child in psychiatric care due to this? Can you show out of pocket costs? That is the first test...then you can possibly include pain and suffering...but that is generally on top of the actual damage
I would post over there to get their responses.
another test to tell you if have a case is to seek a lawyer willing to take it on contingency....that is...they only get paid if the win. Lawyers don’t take such cases they know they can’t win...but will take the case if you are paying hourly for it.
The family...for being bad people? The funeral director that was lied to?
I understand that you are hurt and grieving. Has the killer been caught?