My 93 year mom had embolectomy with general anesthesia on January 20,2022. Surgery went well. She was discharged on January 22, 2022. Ever since her surgery, it has not been the same. She sleeps a lot. Does not eat much. Refuses her medications. Uncooperative in every way. Unable to walk. I am wondering if she is going to make it? Is there anything I can do to make her feel better? I shared all this with her doctor. He thinks that she should be put on hospice. I would like to make her better. Any suggestions are appreciated.
If she recovers, then she may "graduate" from hospice. Many do. Hospice is NOT euthanasia.
I cannot imagine ANY intervention with this woman at this point that would involve "forcing" her to eat, unless her EOL instructions including installing a feeding tube in these circumstances.
That wouldn't be my way, but others wish every possible intervention done.
My late MIL had an aortic aneurysm that was about to burst. She chose the surgery; survived it but had a stroke afterwards. It advanced her dementia and she decided to starve herself to death.
I don't think hospice is "washing your hands" of a patient.
It's the compassionate choice here. And most surgeons don't even acknowledge that it exists, in my experience.
What meds she's on matters. If she's on blood thinners and will die without them, and if they can't be hidden in a preferred food, like ice cream, then yes, she'll die.
I wonder if she had a stroke during surgery that has made swallowing difficult? And advanced her dementia to the next stage?
Hospice will provide an alternating air pressure mattress to prevent bed sores. They can provide an extra set of eyes on her mom and allow mom some respite from poking at prodding.
Mom's will to live will be the determining factor here.
General anesthesia is hard on the elderly brain. It's even harder on the elderly brain of a person with dementia.
In your shoes, I would bring in hospice to give her some extra care and comfort to see if she recovers over time.
The standard that I often hear regarding anesthesia is that for every hour you are under, it takes a month of recovery. It hasn't been a month yet.
Feed your mom what she will eat. If that's ice cream, slushies and mashed potatoes, so be it. Consult with her doctor about which meds are crucial. Ask if they can be given in liquid or patch form, or crushed into food.