My mom is verbally abusive towards my dad ( her primary caregiver). She accuses him of infidelity and moving women into their home. We have cameras throughout the home to prove his innocence. She is fixated with her false perceptions and refused to believe the truth. I want her to get an mental evaluation but she refuses. I am concerned that my dad will walk away from her to save his sanity.
What sort of responsibility do you feel you have for your parents?
They are responsible for their own lives and you are at liberty to say "no" to requests (as do your siblings, it seems).
Dad needs to talk to his/their doctor about how her mental health challenges should be handled.
You said that Mom behavior is abusive, she is making “false”accusations,and she is in denial!
Mom may refuse to be seen by a physician,but it sounds as though it needed ASAP.
Getting Mom diagnosed may be the the first step. Do you have a support team to help? Other than your Dad?
Technology is amazing in today society. Get on it to find resources in your state whom will assist and give you direction. 211 information line,State and Federal hotlines!
There are resources available ;but you will have to do the work today! Don’t quit seeking and searching for help and you will get it.
Aging can be a scary journey for senior. They will need ongoing assistance. Be encouraged to fight on.
You need to find ways has you travel this caregiving journey to nurture your soul,mind and body, Keep hobbies and social life going. You will need your strength ,and a lot of courage! During decision making process begins.
Peace ,and direction be unto you! Stay with this web site,it can be a helpful resource.
She is not going to cooperate with a mental health evaluation unless she wants to.
Your dad can take more action in getting her evaluated or not just like he can remain in the home with her or not.
He is her primary caregiver. She is 70, which by today's standards makes her scarcely an elder. I don't care what your siblings say or think, you are talking about two adults who are married to one another. If your mother is suffering mental ill health, the responsibility for finding appropriate help for her lies squarely with your father.
And, by the way, if your father is given reason to believe that your mother will be better off in your hands and he is no use to her, he's that much more likely to walk. Do not undermine him by intervening. Do not confuse interfering with supporting.
Help your father by researching resources for him and providing a listening ear. Other than that, stay out of it. This is between the two of them.