Over 1 month in hospice and she's stable physically. I feel guilty, but can't keep up the same level of attention indefinitely. We thought perhaps her passing was imminent of course because of hospice, but she continues to rally. Her mind has good days and bad, better now that some of the behavior is somewhat controlled by medications. Physically she's okay, better than she was. I was babying her and allowing every whim (but smoking) and giving up all outside activities. Checking on her constantly, sleeping on couch nearer to her. Right now I'm trying to take the weekend to let my family do most of the caregiving while I reasses her needs. We can't all be in limbo indefinitely.
Like the Nike commercial says, "Just Do It" Emotionally, it is not easy to do, but it is a needed choice.
I wish you the best as you get your emotions some rest.
It sounds as though this has been an emotional and physical roller coaster for you. Get some rest!