Palliative care for depression?

I’m sorry your mother is facing this. Did she have another neck surgery?

I have palliative care in place for cancer. I find this team of a social worker and M.D. (who retired in Dec w/o mentioning it to me!) to be condescending and minimizing when it comes to understanding terminal illness in general. They ask questions like, "have you ever thought of ending your life?" And "have you ever felt sad?" It's illogical NOT to have felt sad or to have thought of ending ones life when faced with very painful or difficult situations! I was shocked at their lack of insight, and surprise at my answers to their questions, frankly. A waste of time. But, the MD wrote me a prescription for anti depressants which have helped me quite a bit. So that component wad good.

That said, I'm sure not all palliative care teams have to be told to Google what symptoms mean, or are so obtuse as my team is. If you can find a good team for your mom, it may make a huge difference for her.

Good luck in your quest.

My husband‘s palliative care nurse practitioner was excellent, and offered him opportunities to talk about feelings regarding end of life issues and decisions. She sensed when he was wanting to talk about things and backed off when he wasn’t. I don’t know that palliative care provides counselors per se but I would imagine they could refer a patient. The nurse practitioner can prescribe and would likely discuss antidepressants or anti-anxiety meds with your mom. It’s all about improving quality of life when you have serious, chronic illnesses.

Just having someone come visit you who is comfortable talking about your fears, death, hospice, etc can provide great psychological support. As far as I’m concerned, there’s no downside to palliative care if someone qualifies(and of course you can discontinue at any time).

In general palliative care is an acknowledgement that you no longer wish to pursue any life extending treatments and medications, it's essentially hospice care without the formal designation or benefits..... I'm not sure what you are hoping to accomplish with palliative care.

The issue we found with a feeding tube in a mentally competent person was this—my mother’s feeding tube was placed post stroke when we had a small army of doctors convinced that it would be temporary, just a bridge to help until recovery. She went to rehab, worked on recovery valiantly, but no recovery happened. In fact, over time, she lost more skills. But she remained mentally intact and miserable in a completely non functional body. So when do you pull the feeding tube and decide to starve a person who’s awake and aware? The answer is never. So it went on for four years, four long years I’ll never know how she survived in total misery. I’d agree your mother can and should receive some counseling concerning her decision. She also should be respected for realizing the full implications of what another feeding tube can mean. Tasting food is one of our basic pleasures, to be permanently robbed of that in favor of formula being sent in a tube would be a tough thing for anyone

You have filed this under depression, and I am certain there is some depression involved.
There is also, however CHOICE involved.

As a retired RN I have seen enough that certain things are written clearly in addendums on my advance directive as to what I will decline now and always (I am currently 81 but it has been there for decades); among those is the placement of a feeding tube for any reason, even temorarily, either NG or PEG, and any other artificially introduced feeding (IV TPN et al). When I can no longer feed myself the nourishment required for life it is my choice to die, something that we all will do. I feel the same about dialysis, chemo at my age, and etc.

This isn't about depression. It is about reality for me. It is about how I feel about quality of life.

This also isn't about YOUR choice. It is about your mother's choice. And she is the one who should be making this decision.

Please discuss what you mother wants with her.
Then go with her to her doctor to discuss this.
The doctor can then discuss with her the need to see a counselor to comb out her wishes and the reasons for it, to decide whether a trial of a mild anti-depressant might help, or if this is a decision she has long help for her own quality of life.
Then referral is made to palliative care, hospice, and etc.

Your mother may also wish to explore options for VSED in future, if that is her wish. It is a process, not a decision made on a whim.

Unfortunately, in the USA we seem to have developed a hesitancy not to acknowledge any of these issues, and not to discuss them with the very person whose very life is involved.
I hope you will discuss all this with your mother and she will feel free to discuss all of this with her medical team.

I would think palliative care would work with her, given that she has a chronic condition and is not coping well.
I wonder if it would help her to join a forum/Facebook group for others living with feeding tubes. I’m sure there are YouTube videos of people living and thriving with this condition (that you could screen and share with her).