I think it would help for my aunt to have a phone in her room in the nursing home so she could call me. But she has pretty severe dementia. She now keeps trying to leave the home. They call me which is just fine with me and I can talk her down. She asks for a phone to call me but she doesn't have the ability to make the call. I don't know what to do. I think if I put a phone in the room she will misdial all sorts of people or call 911. I can't visit her every day because I am not well myself--I go at least one to 2 times a week. The nursing home is ok with calling me and handing her a phone to talk a bit whenever this happens which is about once a week. If I get her a cell phone it will be lost and she won't be able to figure it out anyway. Is there anything else I can do or is this just the new normal and we slug it through.
I apologized saying that was my Aunt who was 99, and I will see what I could do. Then I called my Aunt's son and told him what she was doing. Since then her caregiver would dial the number.
But I do have a suggestion for you - I'm assuming your her DPOA MPOA - I'd try to find out just how soon she is scheduled for her next "care plan" meeting. & move it up. At the CPM you discuss If she could actually leave; what safeguards are there (cameras on all doors); if perhaps a change of medications could help; if she would be better on a locked ward & if NH doesn't have this then how & where to move her. You go to the CPM with your questions & write down the answers - perhaps take some with you to do this. At the end of the meeting, you will be asked to sign off and you can write in things you want addressed for her care. As its in her chart, well... it cares more weight.
CPM are required by Medicare. They can be done by phone. But I found doing them in person really helped as it establishes who you are, who your mom /aunt is and you get to know those in dietary, activities & beyond the nursing staff. I took some sort of goodie - small apples, cookies, those tiny birthday party sherbets - and once everybody knew my moms CPM was coming up, well they came to the meeting. Plus if their eating, they make more time at the meeting. The NH staff is going to be long term relationship & things like this do make a difference to keep it positive.
Why not call the facility when you are available and ask them to put her on the phone. Of course, she'll likely not remember, but, we have to focus on the moment and for that moment, she's happy to have you on the line.
I would be very concerned about her trying to leave the facility. When my loved one did that in regular AL, they told me that it was NOT something they could handle. Her doctor immediately prescribed a Secure Memory Care facility for her.
Has the NH mentioned anything about a more secure environment for her? Might she be able to actually leave the building on her own, or does she have mobility issues or some other reason she couldn't?