I feel guilty asking this question, but has anyone regretted their decision to let a family member move in? I think I made a mistake.

I don't think it helps that my mother in law's ex husband is an alcoholic so he has not been in the picture for years. I think my husband feels like if he doesn't rescue his mom, who will? I only pray that my husband's father doesn't step back into our lives telling us he is sick and needs help. Ugh!

It can break marriages, relationships with children, personal health, etc.

Your mother in law has you in an unfavorable triangle as your husband's mother. It's like he has to chose between which woman he is going to please. What sometimes look like a strong marriage gets suddenly full of drama when the one who truly never left mommy's hip or daddy's side suddenly reverts back to being mommy's or daddy's little boy or girl who just happens to be in an adult body and an adult relationship called marriage.

Ya mother in law needs to realize that she is living in your house as an act of your gracefulness for otherwise she'd be in a nursing home paid for my medicaide as poor as she is. You and your husband's house means you two need to set the rules and boundaries. Role reversal is tough and might even be tougher for your husband which might mean both of you would possibly benefit from marriage counseling to deal with it.

I am new to this website but I thought it might be helpful to hear what others are going thru. My mother in law is not at the end of her life. She is only 64. She moved in with us because 4 years ago her overall health was very poor, mostly her knees were shot. She was barely walking which then lead to weight gain, diabetes etc.
My husband and I knew that she was in over her head and he asked me if she could move in to get a handle on things. Between the health and her money issues, I realized that this was her only option other than bankrupcy. Assisted living is not an option because she lives paycheck to paycheck with no savings.
It has been 4 years and she had knew surgery. It went well and she is more mobile now. Her financial is better but not at a point she has money to burn or a has long term financial security. I think she loves living with us but now I have regret. On one hand, she makes poor decisions about her life choices and exercise. My kids are young but I am thinking this must be what its like to have a teenager in the house.
On one hand I don't want to boss my 64 mother in law around but on the other I don't want to pretend I agree with her decisions. What worries me is that often my husband and I are at odds of what to do about her. I can see how a situation like this can break even a strong marriage apart.

I'm sure people have! It is a big decision to take on the care of someone in your home! My husband decided it would be better for my mom to move in with us than for me to travel an hour each way each day to stay with her. While I understood what we were undertaking (my daddy had Alzheimer's), he was surprised by the care that was actually needed. I must say, he has been a real trooper since discovering the reality of the situation but it is hard. We were empty-nesters enjoying our grandchildren on occasion but essentially traveling as we wanted when we wanted when we weren't working. Now our wings are clipped! I consider myself lucky to have a sister that will come down for a weekend each month and let us get away.

I don't know your situation but please, don't feel guilty. I'm sure you didn't realize the impact it was going to have on your life, whatever it may be. You're going through the stages of grief, I'm sure, because that's what it is like.