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Thanks everyone for your input on my Dad's situation. I guess I should have started by saying - he is not totally dependent. He can bathe himself, dress himself and get around on a walker. So, that is why we have made the decision to let him go home and see how that goes. He is very sharp in the mind. I think if we can get meals on wheels, first alert and maybe 1 day of home healthcare he will do okay. I really do appreciate everyone giving me there advice and tips. Will keep you posted.
I am not an expert and am only replying based on my experience. You said rehab is "releasing" your father. Do you mean his is in rehab now and either the Medicare paid days are over or they don't think he would benefit from further rehab? If latter and you think more rehab in the facility would help, you can appeal that. I think as a relative you can without having health care surrogacy or power of attorney but you need to check on that.
You should visit the official Medicare site to get accurate details if you want to pursue this avenue of appealing rehab or nursing home discharge. If they are suggesting transfer to nursing home and you don't agree he needs 24 hour care, you could get another opinion, pehaps from his regular doctor, but sometimes they don't know all the details of current situation. If he really does need 24 hour care, then refer to what the other earlier posters said, b/c 24 hour care is really 24 hour care and if you are taking responsiblity, you will have to provide it. I've been doing that for my mother for almost 10 years and your life will change dramatically, finacially, personally, workwise and otherwise so unless you or he have adequate financial resources or qualified family members who will help you have to try to think rationally as to whether living at home is the safest decision. As suggested in the other posts, you can also contact state for an evaluation and perhaps see if they provide any community diversion program in lieu of nursing home placement. Every decision is an individual personal decision. I don't know what the future will bring in my situation either. so you have to think not only right now what is best but also the future. It is very hard. Good luck.
Most elders want to go home, most children want to take care of thier parents and we all give it a try. As others have said if you have not doen it and do not know what you are getting yourself in to, then please reconsider, it seems he needs 24 hour care and you must be ready for that. If you can afford help, then hire it. Was he a Veteran? If so, contact the VA for assistance in locating help, this will take time if he has to apply if he is not already in the VA system. PLEASE put yourself first, you will wear yourself out managing his care for 24 hours a day if you are not prepared with equipment and supplies to do so. Listen to Rehab, they are trained to know best. Contact your local Area on Aging or Senior Center for advice as well. Keep us posted. Blessings, Bridget
You can get caregivers to come to your home for as many hours as you cannot give. However, insurance does not pay for caregivers, and a nursing home is cheaper than paying for caregivers 24 hrs/day. Mostly all parents want to go home after a time in rehab. Please contact your local Area Office on Aging while he is still there. They can evaluate his ability to handle his ADL's (Activities of Daily Living), and can evaluate his need for long term care and his need for caregivers, how safe and healthy he would be at home.
AG - the important question is whether YOU can give him the care he needs at home. If not, then now is the time to admit him to a nursing home. Medicare will pay for a certain # of days and then you can get medicaid if he doesn't have funds to pay for himself. With an 89 year old dad, I'm assuming that you're at least 40 - do you have the physical strength to move him from bed? on and off the toilet? in and out of the tub or shower? Do you have the equipment at home to keep him safe? (Grab bars, shower chairs, taller toilet or potty chair near the bed?)
If the answer to more than 2 of these is "no", then please, please re-think taking him home with you. Your own health and physical well being are important too. As much as i'd love to have mom home, I'm just not strong enough to lift her day in and day out. All I'd do is injure my own back and I fear that it would go out and i'd drop her - then we'd both be hurt.
If you need unbiased help making this decision - contact your local area agency on aging and see if they can provide some guidance. Best of luck to you and your dad.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
\
You should visit the official Medicare site to get accurate details if you want to pursue this avenue of appealing rehab or nursing home discharge. If they are suggesting transfer to nursing home and you don't agree he needs 24 hour care, you could get another opinion, pehaps from his regular doctor, but sometimes they don't know all the details of current situation. If he really does need 24 hour care, then refer to what the other earlier posters said, b/c 24 hour care is really 24 hour care and if you are taking responsiblity, you will have to provide it. I've been doing that for my mother for almost 10 years and your life will change dramatically, finacially, personally, workwise and otherwise so unless you or he have adequate financial resources or qualified family members who will help you have to try to think rationally as to whether living at home is the safest decision. As suggested in the other posts, you can also contact state for an evaluation and perhaps see if they provide any community diversion program in lieu of nursing home placement. Every decision is an individual personal decision. I don't know what the future will bring in my situation either. so you have to think not only right now what is best but also the future. It is very hard. Good luck.
Blessings,
Bridget
If the answer to more than 2 of these is "no", then please, please re-think taking him home with you. Your own health and physical well being are important too. As much as i'd love to have mom home, I'm just not strong enough to lift her day in and day out. All I'd do is injure my own back and I fear that it would go out and i'd drop her - then we'd both be hurt.
If you need unbiased help making this decision - contact your local area agency on aging and see if they can provide some guidance.
Best of luck to you and your dad.