I am sure I will never get any respect from my sister and her family ever because they all live under the illusion that they are perfect. Too perfect to come around and help out with our Mom too! My brother is all the way across the US from us so I can't say anything about him physically being here to help. My sister lives 2 minutes away. She tends to come around when I (the caregiver of 3 yrs now) have had some sort of failure or a let down in my life. I don't tell her about these mishaps- my mother does. And boy when Mom gets to talk about anything negative- she goes to town. My sister is always worried about her inheritance and what she will have to deal with when mom is gone. I don't give a rat's ass about money or the inheritance of anything except stupid trinkets that mean something to me. I am the only kid that has been here for mom and all her mental abuse has left me shredded and broken. Still I love her. When Mom said that my sister is pissed because I lost my job and now "mooching off mom and spending THEIR inheritance," I just about lost it. Sister now is coaching mother on how to kick me out, get me off the will, sell my belongings and the worst - says she hates me. I have been out of a job one month and I am so beat up by these people I can barely think straight. I need to get a job and I've got 30 days to do it- Per my sister, the executor of the estate. This is what I get in return for enduring the mental abuse and anguish from a mother with dementia and possible alzheimer's. I look at it as my way out of here= finally!! I just need to find my independence and a job and let go of it all right??? But how???
Kris
(And don't worry if the journey doesn't go perfectly smoothly. We are proud of you for starting it.)
So sorry you are having to take this journey. It just breaks my heart reading how families are so hateful, thoughtless and petty to each other. God bless!
Of course you love your mom. You can love her just as much visiting her on your schedule, from your home base.
BTW, as executor your sister has NOTHING to say about who lives in Mother's house now. In case she hasn't noticed, Ma ain't dead yet. Who has Power of Attorney for Ma?
Have you been getting paid for the caregiving you have been doing?
Get out. Go visit mom and the two of you can gossip about your sister. ;) ;)