Follow
Share

My mom is coming to live with us. What parts of room and board can we charge her without entering into an agreement that would be considered her paying rent. We do not want to be “landlords” who will be required to evict in the future.

I wish you well. I hope that everything works out the way you want it to.

It isn’t always the best solution to move a parent into our home. It is challenging.

Just be aware that relationships can change when people choose to live together.

Too much togetherness can become an issue. Not anticipating certain things is also a factor.

Be as prepared as you can, if you are going to move forward with this arrangement.

Talk about important details now, rather than after your mom moves in.
Helpful Answer (0)
Reply to NeedHelpWithMom
Report

Once she gets her mail at your address, regardless if a guest or tenant, she will have to be evicted if she refuses to move out voluntarily.
Helpful Answer (1)
Reply to Dawn88
Report

You will all go to see an elder law attorney.
There you will draw up a "care contract".
You will come to an agreement about how much she will pay in shared living costs which will include your mortgage/upkeep/insurance costs, food costs, preparation of food, cleaning, transport and etc.
This is important so that any future needs of mom's for any governmental assistance will not look as tho she has been "gifting" you.
Also, shared living costs are not taxed while "rental is". Your attorney will explain all of these details, and that's why you need one functioning in your area of the country.

This contract should also stipulate when and how often the ENTIRE blended family will assess how well the living arrangements are working; if it isn't working for ONE of you then Mom needs to agree to placement in care.

It is important to discuss privacy needs for you and for her, living spaces and activities, and etc.
Wishing you good luck.

Along with all others here I wish to caution you that the moment you take your mom into your home you have made it HER HOME. You WOULD have to evict her whether she gave you a penny or not. I would also ask, you being a new member on forum, that you and hubby spend a solid week here reading this Forum. You will get a lot of insight into what you are planning.
Helpful Answer (1)
Reply to AlvaDeer
Report

In my state (MN) if someone's mail goes to that address it is proof that it's their legal residence. You need to check the laws in your state very carefully as I'm sure they all differ.

I encourage you to think very deeply about moving her in. Please the multitude of posts on this forum under the Care Topic: Burnout. Once you move her in, you are by default her manager, her 24/7 caregiver, medical transport, entertainment committee, etc.

She would probably benefit greatly from an IL community where she will have lots of socialization, activities and distractions. A continuum of care community would be ideal.

If you do move her in, please make sure she assigns you as her PoA. If she refuses, this would be a deal-breaker for me.
Helpful Answer (0)
Reply to Geaton777
Report

"We do not want to be “landlords” who will be required to evict in the future."
Sorry but once mom moves in a lives with you - you will have to evict her if you want her to move out and she refuses to leave.

I would say don't move mom in but you are probably going to do it anyway. Good luck to you.
Helpful Answer (3)
Reply to anonymous1768885
Report

Ask a Question
Subscribe to
Our Newsletter