I receive disability because I have bipolar 1 disorder. ADD. OCD. PTSD 5 different incidence. Anxiety. Panic attacks. Depression. My health is very much declining I’ve been in the mental institute two times over past 10 years and every time I get out it goes back to the same.... I’ve dedicated 10 years of my life and I thought about anyone but my mother and aunt. Finally broke down and asked my father for $10 an hour, nine hours a week which is $90, and he refused. Whenever he pays the housekeeper over $100 a day and she comes one day a week. He expects me to live off my disability whenever I don’t even make enough to live and that is for my mental illness is not for taking care of my mother and it is a lot of care. Should my father pay me? Who by the way is a narcissist. He wants complete control over me and he has it and I had a very successful career before I decided to take care of my mother. I had to move back home from a different state when I have two sisters that wouldn’t even begin to offer. I have not been paid any compensation, not one time except for my father helping me with dental work & occasionally other things which I can’t even ask for, I have to get my mother to ask because I have a problem asking for help. I’m sure it’s because I never needed it before but I need it now.
If you are living with mom and dad I would start looking for another place to live. Get any type of job you can. (IF you like caregiving work for an agency and get paid for what you are doing for free)
Tell dad you are going to cut back on the help. Eventually stop. This is why I suggested you look for another place if you are living there.
If you are seeing a therapist to help you with some of your other problems you might want to discuss this. If you are not seeing anyone you might want to consider it.
If ur on Medicaid for your supplimental (assuming u have Medicare), they offer transportation to appts. Office of Aging may have senior bussing for shopping.
You need to get your life back or your going to find yourself caring for this man. Once you get out of this situation, you will probably be much better. To the point, maybe you can have a job to suppliment your SSD. Your allowed to make up to 17k I think. Something to check out, You may find that once you r away from this man, you do well enough to seek f/t employment and can get off SSD. But only you can do this. If u do move, I would give no one ur contact info. You need to "heal" and to do that you need to stay away from Dad. Maybe you can eventually go back to the State where u were living.
Good Luck
As far as getting pay for past care given, you did not do a contract with your family for this care in the office of a Lawyer. Your father could as easily go now into any negotiation claiming that you are dependent on him because of the se
verity of your disability, and that HE is doing things for YOU and where is HIS pay, if you see what I mean.
I believe that it is time now for you to concentrate on your own life, to leave off from caregiving and dependency and to move on your own, even if into a room in someone else's home, to get a job. Many people with mental illness work. It is true that they will have times when the current cocktail of medications with therapy aren't working and need adjusting; it is true that they may on occ. need some time in hospitalization, but nevertheless they continue with education, job, family, and with working.
I know that you would want us to level with you as a "normal" person who has asked us a question. I am so sorry for what you are dealing with, but your exact diagnosis grouping is something that a young person in my own family is dealing with/has dealt with for years. Those years that this person stayed within the home environment was a setback, and luckily good psychological care help to move this person into dealing with life and illness. This person now has a valued life, and is on the way to more, and that despite the fact that this is likely a lifelong diagnosis that will always have to be dealt with. So I know where you are at when you speak of this.
I wish you nothing but the very best of life. It takes a huge amount of courage for the young to "leave home" and get a life. But it is time for you to face that fear headon. And the success you will bring to your life will help to built you, rather than keeping you torn down. There's no time limit and for every step forward you will perhaps at times suffer two steps back. Still, the forward momentum is going to happen. I have read so very many books and each person says that the key to their movement forward was to leave the shelter/safety/and OFTEN the stiffling situation of living at home. Eventually, on your OWN is where you will be. Start now. It's easier when there is a safety net to fall on when needed.
Again, I am in your corner and wish you nothing but the best.