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My mom was in and out of hospice for 2.5 years. They were hellish years and the best thing that could have happened was that she passed right away after getting into hospice the first time, but she lingered horribly. Dad was in hospice for only a few months and begged to die throughout. My friend was in hospice for 10 days after stopping cancer treatment that wasn’t working. Her family thought she’d last longer.
It’s as individual as people are. I sorry for the loss of grandma, but count it as a blessing that hospice was there to help and that she didn’t linger in pain and suffering.
Dad passed 19 days after hospice came on board, and mom passed a bit over 2 months after hospice came on board. Thankfully. Both were more than ready to go, mom w advanced dementia and CHF and dad with a brain tumor. If you're suggesting hospice "euthanized" them, I say nonsense. Neither one of them were even given any pain meds till they were in the last week of their lives, semi comatose with organs shutting down!
Mom had a friend in AL who was on hospice for three YEARS before she passed!
You do realize hospice stops getting paid once a patient dies, right?
Most people call in hospice far too late, which is what I suspect happened in the case of your grandmother.
A lot of people don't know about hospice, don't understand how it works, or are just unwilling to accept a person's decline and won't stop doing everything in their power to keep them alive or "cure" them.
Hospice does not kill people -- period. Their focus is on quality of life (pain management, no invasive procedures, etc) than quantity (endless runs to the hospital, surgeries, chemo that isn't working, new medications, etc.)
My parents were both on hospice. My dad was diagnosed with inoperable cancer and went on hospice about three weeks later. That saved us from having to put him in the car to go to doctor appointments. Nurses came to the house instead and monitored him there. He died six weeks after his diagnosis, and a hospice nurse was there with us when he died.
My mother was in and out of the hospital for years and her final stay was during the Covid lockdown. She was in the hospital then rehab for a total of two weeks and as she also had dementia, she was distraught and confused the entire time. I made the decision that we were done with hospitals and from then on anything that ailed her needed to be treated at her nursing home. (For example, oral antibiotics vs. going to the hospital for IVs.) That's how I changed the focus on the quality of her life.
Hospice did not stop her medications, treated her for a pressure sore she got in the hospital, and initiated treatment for gout she developed during her time on hospice. She was definitely not killed by hospice, and in fact, she enjoyed more personalized care during the seven months she was on it than she had up until that point.
No. You should discuss with your loved one's hospice MD and the nurses what to expect. People enter hospice in many stages. Some in fact currently are in hospice because the MD is fudging things, saying that death is expected within fewer than six months when this is not really the truth; they want the extra care, so fib a bit about expectations.
You and the medical team at bedside are the best judges of what to expect, as YOU know what we don't. The age. General debility. Diagnosis. Prognosis. Ability to take in nourishment. ETC. All these things matter a great deal.
So discuss this with your medical team, and as far as expectations in anything medical, as an old RN and under the subject of "the expected" I would tell you to expect the unexpected.
Wishing good luck to all and hope you have a good hospice team.
This is a difficult question to answer as everyone in hospice care does not have the same experience as your grandmother did. I have know of many people who were coherent right up until they died. My ex sister-in-law’s mother was coherent right up to the moment before she died. My ex sister-in-law went to visit her mother and her mother told her that she felt like eating some freshly baked bread. My ex sister-in-law left and went home to bake the bread for her mother. When she returned to delivered the bread to her mother, her mother had already passed away. Apparently, the mother did not want her daughter to be in the room as she was dying. Another experience that I have had recently is that of my friend’s mother, who was 103 years old, who was sitting in the living room speaking to her caregiver when she told the caregiver she was tired and wanted to go back to bed. The caregiver took her back to her bed and she passed away immediately.
I empathize with you on the loss of your grandmother, but I don’t think that your grandmother was euthanized while in hospice care.
Praying that you would find peace in knowing that your grandmother is in a better place where she is free of pain and suffering.
My father was on in patient hospice less than 24 hrs when he passed. He had a long list of issues including end stage CHF and renal failure. He welcomed the morphine (and the end of suffering). They only brought it when we requested it. He actually went 7 hrs between the first 2 doses and slept soundly.
Your grandmother was obviously very sick when hospice was brought onboard, thus why she died so quickly. Often times families wait until the very end to get hospice involved which sounds like the case here. The point of hospice is to keep your loved one as pain free as possible and comfortable as the dying process itself is extremely painful as ones organs start to shut down. My late husband was under hospice care in our home for the last 22 months of his life, so no not everyone dies quickly when under their care. And those were 22 very long months as I watched my husband continue to decline and eventually start his dying process which lasted 41 days with no food, and over 25 days with no drink, and with him being very agitated and in pain which hospice couldn't get under control. It was heartbreaking as his wife to witness. I tell you that so you know that your grandmothers passing could have been so much worse. Be grateful that she didn't have to suffer and that she went quickly and is now at peace. To me that is a blessing for all involved. May God give you His peace, comfort and strength for the days, weeks and months ahead.
"My grandmother was in hospice care for 3 days before passing. She was talking and coherent prior to them coming in, the next day after Hospice started their treatment, she could not talk or move but just slept and stared when awake. Was she given medication that sped up her death? Is Hospice just basically euthanasia?"
There are a variety of answers to this question. Without more knowledge as to the condition of the person it is a hard question to answer.
My mother started hospice in December. She passed away in April. She had serious health issues but for sometime her vitals remained steady and good. Once that took a serious turn she passed away in 24 hours.
I think you may get many different answers to this post. If you provide more information you might get better clarity.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
It’s as individual as people are. I sorry for the loss of grandma, but count it as a blessing that hospice was there to help and that she didn’t linger in pain and suffering.
Mom had a friend in AL who was on hospice for three YEARS before she passed!
You do realize hospice stops getting paid once a patient dies, right?
My condolences on the loss of your grandmother.
A lot of people don't know about hospice, don't understand how it works, or are just unwilling to accept a person's decline and won't stop doing everything in their power to keep them alive or "cure" them.
Hospice does not kill people -- period. Their focus is on quality of life (pain management, no invasive procedures, etc) than quantity (endless runs to the hospital, surgeries, chemo that isn't working, new medications, etc.)
My parents were both on hospice. My dad was diagnosed with inoperable cancer and went on hospice about three weeks later. That saved us from having to put him in the car to go to doctor appointments. Nurses came to the house instead and monitored him there. He died six weeks after his diagnosis, and a hospice nurse was there with us when he died.
My mother was in and out of the hospital for years and her final stay was during the Covid lockdown. She was in the hospital then rehab for a total of two weeks and as she also had dementia, she was distraught and confused the entire time. I made the decision that we were done with hospitals and from then on anything that ailed her needed to be treated at her nursing home. (For example, oral antibiotics vs. going to the hospital for IVs.) That's how I changed the focus on the quality of her life.
Hospice did not stop her medications, treated her for a pressure sore she got in the hospital, and initiated treatment for gout she developed during her time on hospice. She was definitely not killed by hospice, and in fact, she enjoyed more personalized care during the seven months she was on it than she had up until that point.
You should discuss with your loved one's hospice MD and the nurses what to expect.
People enter hospice in many stages. Some in fact currently are in hospice because the MD is fudging things, saying that death is expected within fewer than six months when this is not really the truth; they want the extra care, so fib a bit about expectations.
You and the medical team at bedside are the best judges of what to expect, as YOU know what we don't. The age. General debility. Diagnosis. Prognosis. Ability to take in nourishment. ETC. All these things matter a great deal.
So discuss this with your medical team, and as far as expectations in anything medical, as an old RN and under the subject of "the expected" I would tell you to expect the unexpected.
Wishing good luck to all and hope you have a good hospice team.
Her life was not taken away. Her suffering was, and she is smiling down on you. Tell her you love and miss her.
I empathize with you on the loss of your grandmother, but I don’t think that your grandmother was euthanized while in hospice care.
Praying that you would find peace in knowing that your grandmother is in a better place where she is free of pain and suffering.
Often times families wait until the very end to get hospice involved which sounds like the case here.
The point of hospice is to keep your loved one as pain free as possible and comfortable as the dying process itself is extremely painful as ones organs start to shut down.
My late husband was under hospice care in our home for the last 22 months of his life, so no not everyone dies quickly when under their care. And those were 22 very long months as I watched my husband continue to decline and eventually start his dying process which lasted 41 days with no food, and over 25 days with no drink, and with him being very agitated and in pain which hospice couldn't get under control. It was heartbreaking as his wife to witness.
I tell you that so you know that your grandmothers passing could have been so much worse. Be grateful that she didn't have to suffer and that she went quickly and is now at peace. To me that is a blessing for all involved.
May God give you His peace, comfort and strength for the days, weeks and months ahead.
"My grandmother was in hospice care for 3 days before passing. She was talking and coherent prior to them coming in, the next day after Hospice started their treatment, she could not talk or move but just slept and stared when awake. Was she given medication that sped up her death? Is Hospice just basically euthanasia?"
My mother started hospice in December. She passed away in April. She had serious health issues but for sometime her vitals remained steady and good. Once that took a serious turn she passed away in 24 hours.
I think you may get many different answers to this post. If you provide more information you might get better clarity.