She is unwilling to show any documentation. She is on bank account for living mother (who has dementia) who she is claiming POA over. None of us are certain it is legitimate considering the lifestyles of our parents.
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The POA doesn't matter until there are decisions to be made. At which point, if she is to make the decision on your mother's behalf regarding, say, a facility or a bank or a realtor, your sister will be obliged to show documentation and won't be able to act without it. But are there decisions to be made now which other family members wish to make on your mother's behalf? Or are you only suspicious about your sister's management of the bank account?
My guess is that she is unwilling to show any documentation because she doesn't have any. My guess is that she is using the term POA very loosely, and basing her claim to have POA on her being named as a joint bank account holder with your mother and quite possibly believing that it works like this. It is in fact, of course, putting the cart before the horse, but you'd be astonished how many people say "oh, uh, yes, I'm POA" when actually they mean they are next of kin, chief grocery shopper, geographically closest relative, in the room when the forms are being filled in, or whatever.
If she doesn't wish to do this I would get an elder law attorney for the next move.
FYI even if she is the PoA it usually isn't in effect until there is one or more medical diagnosis of incapacity (depending on what is stipulated in the PoA document).
If your Mom is suffering from dementia, what concerns do you have about POA? Do you suspect your Sister of fraudulent behavior? Of embezzling funds? Of doing an improper job?
When your Father died was your Sister ALSO the executor of his will and estate?
If you have reasons for concern (you haven't told us any), then do open a case with APS for wellness check on your Mom, let them know you have concerns, and let them know what those concerns ARE. Then provide any and all proof you are able to APS. While they will not come back to you with ANSWERS they will come back to the reporter to say they either did or did not find reasons for concern.
What does she claim POA to do? Just the bank account or does she also make medical or financial decisions? Wouldn't the dr or financial establishment need to see a POA before they let her make a decision?
My money is on that the PoA doesn't have to prove it to any individual (as opposed to an entity like a bank or hospital, etc), unless there's evidence of financial fraud/abuse and they've been accused... but find it hard to believe this could really be the answer. I've emailed our family's elder law attorney and am waiting for his answer. I will post it when he responds.
If you have ANY feelings something isn't right, no answers given, fishy things going on, get a didn't. Immediately!!!
My lawyer told me I should have never waited. Sibling up to all sorts of shenanigans. He said I waited too long. I believed her and had no proof of anything. Lied to me over and over.
You are entitled to see a list of assets that are given to the court when a person dies. I never got that. Of course your mom hasn't passed. You are also entitled to answers.
Took my sibling to court and found out all sorts of things. I won't go into but it was bad. Very bad.
So get a lawyer and she will have to show proof she is poa. And can get an accounting of things.
My mistake was I waited. Don't wait.
Sounds like your talking about my life for the past 5 years. You are correct……..if they’re being secretive especially when things were out in the open before there is definitely something fishy going on.
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