Why on earth would you feel guilty hiring help with the enormous job of care giving an elderly and needy mother? Why would you think the entire burden of 24/7 care should fall on you? Unless you are Superwoman and have superhuman powers, you're deluding yourself to think you can do it all alone. It often takes an entire village to care for an elderly person, especially if they suffer from dementia and incontinence. Ditch the guilt and draw up a plan of action to sort out the care...ie: daycare, respite care, in home caregivers, etc. Whatever it takes to keep her safe and you sane. All the best
Perhaps the fact that I'm not yet in your shoes allows me clarity.
Do you feel guilty for securing a bit of help? Consider the alternative. If taking care of your mother is putting a strain on your marriage, it will likely soon put a strain on your health. What good will you be to your mother then?
You are a human being, not a machine. You need rest and refreshment. Hiring help two times a week so you can get out is more than reasonable.
All the best
Perhaps the fact that I'm not yet in your shoes allows me clarity.
Do you feel guilty for securing a bit of help? Consider the alternative. If taking care of your mother is putting a strain on your marriage, it will likely soon put a strain on your health. What good will you be to your mother then?
You are a human being, not a machine. You need rest and refreshment. Hiring help two times a week so you can get out is more than reasonable.
Secure your own oxygen mask first...