Taking parent out of home for the day, does this cause added anxiety?

When moms dementia started advancing and I'd take her over to my house for a holiday or Sunday dinner, I started noticing her desire to leave and get back to her apartment almost immediately after arriving. She'd start to nervously look at the clock and say it was "getting late" or "getting dark out" or that she had something important to do at her AL that required her attention. Or that she'd forgotten to take a pill. Then she would decide not to use the bathroom at my house bc she had a walker and felt uncomfortable bringing it into the powder room. Or trying to change her Depends in there and/or clean herself up. The issues she felt she was facing coming to see me were harder to overcome than staying home to begin with.

So I stopped going to pick mom up to come to my house, and I'd bring the festivities to her. As dementia advances, so normally does agitation, Sundowning, anxiety, OCD type issues, and general forgetfulness about the order in which everyday things are done. Things we take for granted, they get confused about. Like where the bathroom is located at the siblings home. You'll have to keep an eye out for general discomfort on moms part to know if taking her out of her element is a good idea or not. If she's acting out or more agitated than normal, keep her in a more stable and familiar environment which is always recommended for elders suffering from dementia. A regular routine they can come to rely on tends to make them most comfy and relaxed.

Best of luck to you.

It may not be the 'taking out' as much as the stimulation + progression of the disease. My experience is that they will try to keep up appearances as best they can and, because AD spares the ability to interact for a while, it may not be obvious to you that she's using a lot of her mental reserves on trying to keep up. Going out or pushing her to do activities when she's starting to lose more abilities can set her up to fail and create anxiety, which can divert her focus and cause confusion. At some point 'stimulation' is not a positive thing. Even simple chores require a person to be able to remember things and do them in order, and she may be losing that ability. People early in AD say they see things for a task laid out, they know what they're for, but they can't put them in order and so it's hard to get started. And that ties back to reducing challenges or decision making, and reducing demands on their focus. My mom definitely has a point where her resources have been maxed out and she wants to be back in her apartment. She used to be able to come to my house all day, then half a day, then 2 hours, and now she can handle an hour long lunch and she's ready to go 'home'. Too, people can have good and bad times of the day-if your mom's consistently confused at a certain time, perhaps work around that. It sounds like she's getting great care! Just see what your mom handles best (time of day, less activities, same environment).

A lot of folks take their loved ones to an adult daycare center anywhere from 2-5 days a week and they thrive and love it. And no it doesn't add to their anxiety.
But like already said, everyone is different and you know your mom best, so do whatever she enjoys and makes her happy.
And you may want to look into putting her into an adult daycare center in your city as that way she can be taken care of, entertained and fed for the day and you and your siblings can get a break and do things you all enjoy too without having to worry about mom.
Bottom line it is all about keeping a routine with your loved one with dementia as that helps keep them calm and they know what to expect.

I’ve observed that dementia patients in my family have thrived on routine. They seemed not to need outside stimulation as a normal person would. Changes confused them. I suspect it’s because after a break in normal thought pattern, their brains have to scramble to get back into a pattern that they understand. That’s work, and their brains get tired. Then they start to get upset or crabby or get caught in a loop.

It reminds me of raising toddlers. They seem to go through something similar when their brains aren’t up to a task, like a full day of shopping during which they get tired and have a tantrum.

I agree with Alva. You’re the only one who can answer this question. If you see a change in your mom and going out is upsetting to her then stop taking her out.

Welcome to Forum, Kate.

Your question I would say is best answered by your own family. Every person suffering from dementia has his/her own identify and individual reactions; almost as individual as their own fingerprint. Over all and for the most part, the more advanced dementia becomes the more comfortable people are with a habitual routine that has few day to day, week to week, month to month changes. But that's just a guideline, because some love change and outings.

If you are observing an increase in anxiety that will be your cue to try to make fewer changes. One of the things I notice most in my own aging process (I am 80) is an increase overall in anxiety. I have always been a bit introverted, a "home body" as they say. That is only more so, and at this point I notice the same sort of things I noticed first in my life as a young Mom trapped at home with a few kids: a sort of tendency toward agoraphobia. I tend to avoid going out, and I have to make myself do it. Everyone is different, but AARP had a recent small article saying that "anxiety" is one of the least addressed and most prevalent problems in the elderly.

I will leave it to you. You are watching and you are THINKING about this, so I trust you to be observant of changes.

Best to you. You have a wonderful, supportive family there.

Only you can determine that. When she comes back to her house, is she highly confused? Or just for a little while till she adjusts. My Mom lived with us and lasted about an hr out of the house. Just enough time to eat and get back home. I stopped taking her to Church because it overwhelmed her.