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Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
Share a few details and we will match you to trusted home care in your area:
First, use English. Explain why you believe this to be the case and offer alternatives that will work to get him where he needs to go. If his doctor agrees with you, have them tell Dad what you told Dad. If you must, disable his car. This is where it starts to get ugly, but letting him drive when he's not safe is not so smart either. Bring in other family members with the same message to Dad if you can. Expect resistance. This is going to hurt, no matter how you do it. Good Luck. God Bless You.
I had this same situation with a very stubborn mother and finally used the direct approach. "Mom do you think you should be driving anymore, it scares me to get in the car with you and I'm afraid you're going to hurt/kill someone" She handed the keys straight over.
My father ( who has dementia) was hiding his drinking (had always been a bourbon man but switched to vodka) and didn't make it home one night. He passed out behind the wheel at a stop sign on the street behind my parents house. My mother had looked for him, called relatives, then called the police to report him missing. The police found him and sent him to the hospital in an ambulance. I realized when I got there that God had literally put my dad's keys in my hands. It made the decision so much clearer. We were extremely lucky that no one had been hurt or killed (including him). Yes it was hard for my mother having him ask everyday for the keys. I suggested we change one lock so he could open his van but not be able to drive it. I also disabled it for a while just in case he had additional keys hidden somewhere. He continued to ask for the next year and a half and I had to stand firm with him. So did my mother. Once you have addressed the situation, you will probably be at peace with knowing you have done the right thing, even though it scares the stew out of you now. Driving is a privilege (that is why we all have to pass a test) not a right. I'm about to have to address the issue with my mother - she has macular degeneration (and recently has MANY marks on her car).
Dianna I abstracted this information-in part for you~
It's heartbreaking to see aging parents or loved ones lose their mental or physical ability to be safe drivers.
The warning signs can be scary. You see their reaction time slow significantly and dexterity diminish. They become easily confused or disoriented when driving or following directions. Vision and perception problems prevent them from accurately reading road signs. And illness or other physical limitations impair their ability to drive effectively.
Ultimately, it may be up to you to tell them that they can't drive anymore.(and to add---you may be able to have your family physician make the reccommendation to your Dad-----As I did-when I had to have my Mom stop driving., when she first went into Assisted Living....I have heard that some people will remove or disable an engine part-so the car will not start. Best to you in your caregiving, Hap
I disabled my fathers truck by removing a spark plug and he could not remeber how to fix his truck. Be sure and contact any mechanic he may call and ask them to quote a huge amount to fix his truck. Then he will say he cannot afford to have car fixed and may be willing to give up driving. Also offer a taxi service for him and you pay for it. in Texas they have something called TAPS-it costs very little and if given 24 hrs notice they will pick up and deliver to Drs appoint,ments. if all else fails write yout Dept Motor Vehicle and they will bring him in for a road test. Sometimes if his medical Dr tells him not to drive they listen better.
If you do not feel he is safe call the DMV and they probably will have him take a road test which he will not be able to pass or just tell him he can not drive if he has an accident you may be held responsible and you can help him find other ways to get around-he will not be happy but there comes a time when it is no longer safe for an elder to drive.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
It's heartbreaking to see aging parents or loved ones lose their mental or physical ability to be safe drivers.
The warning signs can be scary. You see their reaction time slow significantly and dexterity diminish. They become easily confused or disoriented when driving or following directions. Vision and perception problems prevent them from accurately reading road signs. And illness or other physical limitations impair their ability to drive effectively.
Ultimately, it may be up to you to tell them that they can't drive anymore.(and to add---you may be able to have your family physician make the reccommendation to your Dad-----As I did-when I had to have my Mom stop driving., when she first went into Assisted Living....I have heard that some people will remove or disable an engine part-so the car will not start.
Best to you in your caregiving,
Hap