We are seniors who live in a remote rural community and my wife developed breast cancer. Since there are no cancer centers near our home, my wife's daughter (my step-daughter) who lives in a major city that has a cancer center encouraged us to move in with her and her family. This we did and my wife was shortly admitted to a cancer hospital and underwent infection control and radiation treatment. She was released from the hospital and is recovering at her daughter's home. She is doing very well now under the care of myself and visiting nurses.
After an initial period of (insincere) warmth and concern for her mother, our daughter and her new significant other started a terror campaign against us. Since, we are currently economically dependent on them for accommodation while I provide care for my wife and job search in this new city, they feel that they can lord over us. Contrary to the original offer, we were moved to a very tiny room in the house instead of the larger room we were promised. Instead of free accommodation, it was demanded that we provide rent as well as housekeeping and transportation services for their family. This we gladly provide but in return we have received disrespect (talking to us as if we are two year olds), insults, verbal abuse, false accusations, slander, bullying and shunning. Strangely, they would eat our groceries instead of their own. Also, they attempted to break up our relationship but this backfired (motivation: control of my wife and her estate). We raised the issue of showing respect for their parents and elders and they scoffed at us.
Every day we experience some kind of abuse and would love to return home but we are stuck here because of the nursing care. My wife is a strong woman and I admire her ability to deal with this situation but I believe that it was the strained relationship she has with her (mentally ill) daughter that brought this cancer on. She certainly doesn't need this emotional abuse when recovering from cancer. Any suggestions on how to deal with this situation?
Chicago1954, hopefully it doesn't come to that. Yes, I find them very scary and I wish I had never known them. I did attempt to initiate a criminal record check on the boyfriend but it wasn't possible.
Now here is irony: our daughter recently received an award for outstanding nursing care that she is giving as a nursing student at the local hospital. If they only knew the other side of her! Once she gets her designation, I pity any patients that might experience her Dr. Jekyll/Mrs. Hyde character.
We have decided together that once we leave that will be the end of our relationship with that family. If I could have foreseen these events, I never would have put my wife in harms way.
With your wife recovering from cancer, she must have a relatively stress free environment. I do think it affects recovery. Wishing you both all the best, and now that you know "how the land lays", protect yourselves accordingly. All the best.