Today and yesterday were rough, some what emotionally hard days for me. Thinking of my deceased mother and how much I want to see her again. As well as rethinking and going over in my mind everything that happened to her, and thinking about my entire life with her and trying to understand her death. The overwhelming feeling is how sorry I am that she suffered, her death, all the things I went through in dealing with it, etc. How I wish she was still here and realizing she is gone. Just trying to understand her passing and all the things that happened.
It doesn’t mean we loved them less - to me it’s a tribute to her parenting skills as well as how my mother made the best at having nothing - my dad died when she was 42 in the 1960’s& she passed at 89, she raised 3 kids alone when being a single mother was not popular but never did she ask anyone for help.
Thus I live my life knowing she made me the strong, spunky, resilient person I am today.
Took me about a year to feel this way.
I am sorry for your loss. But remember she is in your heart & you are her blood. Go forward and honor her by living your life.
This doesn't happen overnight. Grieving takes time. Do you have a close friend or relative you can call on the especially rough days? Someone who won't try to solve the situation, but just listen?