Trying to understand the cost to care for my elderly mother. Where do I start?

"...just needs someone to support her a bit on her daily walks indoors and needs assistance to go to the bathroom. The main reason for the care is to make sure she doesn't fall again."

How much in-home care a day does your mother need? How much will Medicaid cover, and do you know for sure it will cover ANY in-home help?

It's unfair to your sister to be responsible for coverage if any in-home help doesn't show up, don't you think? Will your sister have to be with her all weekend?

This just doesn't seem sustainable.

You don’t say what condition your Mom has and is it something that can be corrected?
It is going to be hard to find somebody just to help with walks and bathroom. For falls you would need somebody to be around all the time and preferably strong male.
And I can assure you nothing and nobody will prevent falls.
My husband has Parkinson’s. He fell few weeks ago just simply walking with walker, fell backwards and required few stitches, luckily no more damage to his head. This time.
PT helps, exercise, ask for OT to evaluate Mom’s home, put grab bars, remove rugs etc.

I know this is overwhelming for your sister and you are trying to help but hard to do from London. Unless one of our members is from the same area as your sister, its going to be hard to give u this info. Sister could call her County Office of Aging to see what agencies are in the area. But sometimes its cheaper just to place a LO into an AL.

You need to be able to pay your way when you need care. Do not liquidate any assets. You will regret it.

I cannot stress this enough; contact a Texas eldercare lawyer about your situation and what the next steps should be.

Do you have *millions* of dollars worth of assets to liquidate to pay for your mother's in-home care? If not, how are you going to pay for your own care when the time comes?

You don't say how old you or your mother are. How many years of in-home care are you prepared to pay for? Her needs will only increase. And it sounds like your mother needs to be in a senior living community that has progressive levels of care including a nursing home.

I have to echo what "isthisreallyreal" says...DO NOT liquidate ANY of your assets.
Or at least until you have exhausted all other methods of helping to pay for her care.
And I want to mention now..you say the "main reason for the care is to make sure she does not fall again" Well I have some news for you she WILL fall again. It is not a matter of IF she falls but when.
Was her husband in the service? If she was married to a Veteran (and not remarried) she might qualify for some help through the VA. If he was a Veteran contact the local Veterans Assistance Commission and they can look up records and help determine if she qualifies.
If ANY medical condition she has might make her qualify for Hospice she would get all supplies, equipment as well as a CNA that would come 2 to 3 times a week to help for an hours or so during that time they would give her a bath or shower, dress her, order supplies. A Nurse would come 1 time a week to check her and order medications. And there is the availability of a Volunteer that could come 1 time a week to give a break to the main caregiver. (mom can live alone and be on Hospice and not have a full time caregiver but if at any time Hospice thinks it is unsafe for her to remain alone they would discuss options)

Thanks everyone for your helpful messages, my mom was taken to the hospital and is now back home, it was Covid19. I live in London and my mom is currently staying with my sister who lives in Dallas. She is on family leave for a month and will go back to work in a few weeks time.

I am looking for a few good companies in the Plano / Frisco area that can provide good in-home care. Any recommendations will be great. Some will be covered by Medicaid as I understand and I happy to cover the rest privately. Thanks

Your mother is not going to get 24/7 homecare no matter what her insurance is.
If she is still mentally sound (no dementia) and her only problem is mobility issues, does she get physical therapy?
Can she use a mobility scooter in her house? Or a wheelchair to get around? If she uses a walker, does she know how to correctly use one? You'd be surprised at how many seniors have no idea how to properly use any of these things. Does she have a LifeAlert system?
First, an occupational therapist should come out and assess her home. They will let you know what's needed to make her home safe for her to get around in.
She may be better suited to move into a senior community. An apartment that is designed and equipped for aging people and mobility issues.
Have a home assessment done. The care agency you're using can help set that up.

Please do not liquidate your assets to pay for moms care.

Contact Department of Health and Human Services to start the Medicaid application or the county counsel on aging to help you with resources.

I want to caution you about believing that another person can stop mom from falling, they can't. Falls happen anywhere, anytime for seniors that forget their own limits or don't understand to be more careful. So, please know what the realities are for this or you will be upset when/if mom takes another tumble.

I would encourage you to get mom some physical therapy to help her get stronger and they can teach her how to do things in ways that lower risk, maybe an occupational therapist, as well. Her doctor can order these services for in home and her insurance should pay.

Since your Mom is a fall risk, she would require an in-home agency aid that is qualified for this level of care, so the hourly rate is the next step up from a companion aid. The last time I hired an agency aid was in 2021 and it was $25 p/hr in FL.

At this stage in her care you should consult with a Medicaid Planner or Medicaid-experienced lawyer to know in advance about qualifying. Most states have a 5-yr look-back period on the application so how you manage your Mother's affairs and assets will matter a lot. Most states' Medicaid programs will only cover LTC, not AL or MC.

My husbands developmentally disabled sister moved to Texas last year with her other brother. She had Medicaid in New York. Apparently in Texas her monthly SSI payment is too high for her to qualify for Medicaid. She receives about $1400/month. The social worker we had contacted said Texas is second to the worst state to get any kind of state services.

Click on the paying for care bubble below your question and you will find lots of information from this site. To find out what your mother may be eligible for and what is available in your area call your local agency on aging and ask for a needs assessment.