Visiting PT and OT refuse to come back to see my dad due to his behavior.

My mother (dementia) went from walking well to bedridden in about 2 months. PT at the hospital. PT at the care home. Male, female, young, old... “I don’t wanna! You can’t make me!” She refused to move a muscle. The manager at the home listened to the verbal abuse my mother dished out to see if she could glean anything helpful, anything that might motivate her. Finally they gave up. So frustrating!

Then he won't receive PT & OT.

File under 'Oh well' 😶

Sorry, I can't think of anything else. All I know is my Oh Well file is growing nicely.

My mother cooperated with her physical and occupational therapists.

Mom did home health and rehab in her 90’s and improved her strength and balance. She did use a walker but was never in a wheelchair.

This wasn’t easy for her since she had Parkinson’s disease. She had a great attitude and worked hard so it paid off for her. Plus, she had terrific therapists who motivated her. They even played mom’s favorite music while she exercised.

I am sorry that your dad isn’t cooperative with the therapist.

I would ask the staff to talk with your dad about his behavior. Don’t place yourself in the middle of it. He may be more likely to listen to someone else other than you. Or he may not listen to anyone but at least you won’t be tied up in it.

Good luck dad.

When he becomes wheelchair bound due to lack of physical exertion, and has no core strength left, then he'll be wheeled around like my mother was. And helped out of bed because he won't be able to do it alone.

There are consequences to all actions we take in life. Including those taken by stubborn elders. And there's certain things an MPOA cannot fix for stubborn elders, too. #Fact

All therapists are not the same. Some know how to work with guys like your dad, and some don’t.

I had great luck with therapy in home for both parents and dh aunt. My mom did her exercise on her own which aunt never did but all were benefitted . . It is simply amazing how little it takes to make a difference.

Something you might consider for your dad is talk therapy. Original Medicare pays for it. You might find someone who would come to him. If dad is good with the phone he could more easily find someone who would call him. This would give him a sounding board for his complaints and might free him up to do pt or ot when he’s had a good vent or has a chance to discuss his issues with someone who seems more on his side.
I have one I talk to twice a week. We often recommend therapy for caregivers but it could also help your dad. Just a thought.

But if dad doesn’t want to do ot/pt, perhaps table it for now and offer again later.

My dad had many rounds of PT and OT, both inpatient in rehab and outpatient in his home. He loved it and cooperated, by which I mean he loved the conversation and attention, having new people to talk with and spend time with doing something different. The exercises they gave him to do on his own rarely, or ever, happened. After each round of therapy, he’d be at a new, slightly lower level of function. I remember thinking how frustrating the elder age group must often be for therapists. They are tired and hard to motivate, indeed we’ll all be there one day, so I’m not judging. In your shoes, I’d just call it done

He will never cooperate he has to be the "Big Gun" it is who he is and he has gotten away with this behavior for years, not a new thing.

Why bother with the PT if he will not cooperate? I wouldn't, it is what it is. If he doesn't want to get stronger and do what is needed that is his decision, trying to force the issue will accomplish nothing.

Hang in there, next week there will be another issue to deal with, choose your battles.

I would tell him what the "in home" told you. But if like my Dad, he probably would not care. I would tell him though, by being uncooperative, he would probably get worse and when his care becomes too much for you, he will be placed. I'm an not against giving a little threat but you have to mean it.

My Dad had a bad heart and was having problems with his legs. In home was ordered for him. The PT was a woman and came into his home with barrels blazing. "Well, Mr E we are going to do this and that" My Mom said she was overbearing. My Dad told her no d**ned woman was going to tell him what to do. The PT discharged him on the spot. Mom was called and told that Dad can't talk to the PTs that way. Mom admitted Dad is hard to deal with but in his defense, the woman was overbearing. So they sent out another PT and Dad had no problem with her.

If you are Medical POA its probably only in effect when a Dr. says Dad is incompetent to make his own informed decisions. Your part is only to make sure Dads wishes are carried out by Drs and staff. If something comes up that is not covered by the MPOA then you make the decision based on what you feel Dad would want. The MPOA does not mean you physically care for him or need to take him to appts. The MPOA just gives you the ability to talk to Drs and staff and make decisions for Dads health.

Sadly, every time my mom was prescribed PT/OT after a hospital stay, they only came 2-3 times before they stopped. They would say she was "unable to improve" or some such thing. It was never real PT like I got after a car accident and went for 2-3x/week for 6 or 8 weeks. They didn't do much and mom didn't want them there anyway, so it wasn't a fight worth fighting.

also - even if they come twice a week, they expect him to do daily exercises on his own. Which he likely wont do, even if he remembers/ is reminded.

Tell him that the doctor has prescribed PT/OT and if he does not cooperate he will be required to go into a nursing home and they will make him do it or he can stay in his own home and work with the PT/OT that is sent.
I found if I used my fathers doctors name and his doctor required something then my daddy would be more willing to do what was asked.

To be honest I would give up on PT/OT at this point.

He has expressed himself as non compliant. IS HE? I am certain he likely is. So that this is a huge waste of funds and resources.

Deterioration is likely inevitable.
I faced this with my brother who ordinarily was so VERY cooperative with everything. He improved so much in rehab a month with exercises for balance. SO MUCH IMPROVEMENT which he actually acknowledged. But once home, and later in ALF he refused to do these simple exercises despite knowing how much they had helped him, and acknowledging that fact. He just wouldn't do it. Other than the fact that he already now suddenly had all SORTS of people at him about what he "should do", and his need as a man who liked control of his own life to have at least SOME control of SOMEthing, there wasn't much I could do to explain this refusal to do the exercises. But he was stubborn and adamant that he would "do them when he wanted" and he never did want to.

I would give up on this. YOU can't control it, either.

SS, I seem to recall that dad is still technically competent. In that case, he is entitled to make his own bad decisions.

He should be told by the administration of the Home Health Agency (not you) that his rude and uncooperative behavior is causing therapy to cease.