Up until now, we haven't had any really big problems with our home care agency, because we have had a long-time caregiver through them, who has been so dependable that we seldom had to ask the agency to solve any problems. Nancy has been an absolute godsend for my 98-year-old mom, who has advanced Alzheimer's and requires a lot of care (and more heavy lifting now). She's been doing 4-hour morning shifts with us nearly every day, plus we've added two nights a week, for which we pay the agency extra. She has Tuesday and Thursday mornings off, and the agency has been sending two other caregivers to fill those shifts. The Thursday morning caregiver (Debbie) is really good with my mother, very competent with lifting my mother, etc.... and when Debbie started with us, we thought that she would be able to fill in more days when needed, whenever Nancy needed more days off. So next month Nancy is finally taking 3 weeks off. I am glad the agency is giving her the time off, because she really needs it. I had thought they would ask Debbie to fill in some of Nancy's morning shifts while she was gone. But when I asked the agency's contact about that, I was told that Debbie would definitely not be available for anything except her 4-hour Thursday morning shift per week. My sister asked them the same thing, and was told the same. The agency said that they did not yet have anyone in mind.... and that they would probably have to hire someone brand new, and have Nancy train them on how to lift my mother, etc.
This morning (Thursday morning) Debbie was here working her shift, as friendly as always. We just happened to be talking about my mother's care, as we always do, and I mentioned that Nancy would be gone for 3 weeks, and Debbie said that the agency had not yet asked her about doing any of Nancy's shifts in March. I was curious, so I asked if she had any open days where she is not scheduled for anyone, and she said yes, there are several days every week in March when she would be able to do Nancy's morning shifts.... but the agency had not asked her.
I think I know why the agency does not want to commit to sending Debbie.... because she is one of their best, most experienced caregivers, and they want to be able to save her for other clients, like the 12-hour clients that would pay more than we do (because our insurance company covers only 4 hours). But we feel that it is not right for them to deny us Debbie (because we were led to believe that she would be a back-up for Nancy, although we did not have that in writing) and it is not right for them to send an unexperienced new hire for my mom who requires special lifting.... after all, we have been a faithful client for years, and we have paid them extra for the night help.
The tricky bit is that we sort of broke a rule by asking Debbie about working the shift. The agency has a rule that we have to ask only the agency about scheduling, not the caregivers. Also, we are afraid that we might get Debbie in trouble if the agency knows she talked to us about it. So we could insist on them sending Debbie, but they would just keep saying she is unavailable.... and it seems like we are stuck. My sister wants to tell them that we talked to Debbie about it, because it would be our fault, not Debbie's, and she thinks they really need to send Debbie. But I'm afraid to risk getting Debbie in trouble.
But on the other hand, it's not right for them to send an unexperienced new hire. If this were you, how would you approach the agency about this?
I've personally had this happen. A client's family member would get my home phone number and call asking why I don't want to work for them anymore. I always told them the truth. No agency contract that any employee agrees to ever states that their employee must lie for the agency to cover their a$$ with clients and families. A scenario like this is likely what's going on with "Debbie" and "Nancy".
Agencies say everything must go through them and that you're not allowed to ask the employees who are in your house for hours on end taking care of your loved ones a question of any kind.
Everything doesn't have to go through the agency or be reported to them.
If not, I think I would do the same as the agency and shop around. You could use this time to see if there is someone else out there that might provide a better service and be committed to your mom. I would just say you were also taking a three week break. Without the commitment of Debbie, a known and family approved replacement, you might as well take care of things yourself. Just leave it vague on who would be doing the caregiving. You or someone you hire privately or from another firm or respite. Nancy does a great job. Debbie does a great job but since learning that Debbie won’t be available, you might as well find a replacement you can train and have confidence will be returning the next time Nancy is away. Of course, you would reconsider if Debbie could be committed for those three weeks. But the respite sounds good as her cna, mom and you and sis could get a break and the agency can have Debbie free for all the other more important clients they are saving her for.
For three weeks you can get by.
Go with the flow...aides come and go. They do have lives of their own.
They may very well be holding Debbie’s schedule either for those new 12 hr clients or to fill in for 12 hr clients (maybe they know of clients coming up that she doesn’t) since she is so experienced and you can’t really blame them for that. If they don’t end up finding somebody acceptable to fill in for Nancy they might end up using Debbie anyway, opening up her schedule you never know. As you say Nancy needs and has earned the 3 week vacation and while 3 weeks sounds like a long time and it is for you, contributing to her vacation if you will by working with the agency, within reason, is something to consider too as you gauge how, what on and when to push harder.
So what happens if OP and family have actually gone away and can’t train up the new person? And what happens if Bundle’s agency work out that sending new people to Bundle and her mother gives them free training, while Bundle still pays for it? My guess is that CM's agency is a bit more ethical, but how do you guess?
It sounds like it could be a bigger problem than just prohibiting the client and the staff from talking about it!
in my family also, we had strong preferences for certain regular, replacement caregivers.
we had no choice - it was completely up to the agency who came.
we got many unexperienced, incompetent ones.
we did ask if we could have our preferred one. (1 caregiver explained that the agency doesn't want caregivers to get too emotionally attached to LOs, that's 1 reason agencies often switch caregivers).
our preferred caregiver was also available, but also explained to us their schedule is out of their hands: the agency decides.
----
our solution?
in my case, i stopped with the agency.
i found private, excellent, consistent caregivers.
much less stress now.
before, i was constantly/daily, many times a day, explaining to new people what needs to be done please.
Good luck
Another thing I thought of.... after we give the agency our list of shifts and our preferences, if the management cannot commit to providing a caregiver fully experienced with lifting, etc., we can send my mother to the hospice respite center for a while during Nancy's absence, and take her off the agency during that time. (The respite center only can do a week, but at least that would be a week.) The agency would lose a full week of money if we did that. We'd have to work it out with my mother's insurance company, but it might be a better option than having an inexperienced caregiver that one week.
Moreover, you and Debbie between you have demonstrated one of the reasons why staff are prohibited from discussing agency business with clients (we all are, and we're all as apt as Debbie to forget the rules too). Here you are speculating about Debbie's hours and your requirements and the agency's staffing needs - but you have no reliable information to go on.
Be constructive, and be clear about what you want. Write down the shifts you want covered. Call the agency, offer to email them the schedule, and say that you would very much appreciate their continuing their strong commitment to continuity of care (cite Nancy) and have a strong preference for Debbie's covering Nancy's vacation. Give them dates by which you need confirmation - after all, there isn't a whole lot of time now - and be positive about it. If they still won't commit, ask them what they will be doing to continue service. But do not breathe a word about Debbie's having said she is available: for one thing there may be other contracts to be fulfilled that she doesn't know about, and for another she shouldn't have told you that.
It's twenty past five in the morning and in less than an hour I will be setting off for my early shift - best of luck, I hope this all falls into place for you.