Mom has been at our house and I have gained 38 pounds in 5 months. She has dementia and screams at night (this has shot my sleep). I care for her 24/7. I could use some coping method suggestions that don't involve opening the fridge.
I have gained weight also, particularly this year. I have always tried to keep in under control because the more you gain, the harder it is to get off. It is hard now because Mom cannot be left alone, so I just sit while she sleeps in her chair. Sometimes I am able to clean her house while she sleeps, as long as I keep an eye on her. So, that is some exercise. Last year I mowed my sister's and her lawn with a push mower (almost an acre) and lost 10 pounds. Plus, I did the weeding. This year I cannot do any of that (even at my house!). I have been able to keep most of that weight off, but started putting on a few pounds this year because of Mom's decline. I sit all day. I feel like I did when I used to work! I get tired of sitting! Most days, I get home too late to walk the dogs or go to the gym. I have started to lose a few pounds the past few weeks, and attribute that to not eating as much. I don't eat the foods that my brother and Mom like to eat. So, I try to bring my own healthy foods. If you are not able to exercise, the only thing you can do is cut back on the amount of food you eat. You may try veggie and fruit smoothies for meals (just watch the serving sizes -- stick to one serving).
I thought I was only the one who was faced with this problem. Although I haven't gained a whole lot, it is a battle to stay away from the cookies and other desserts. Mine is boredom at night because my husband, who loves snacks, allows me to buy him everything sweet like ice cream, pies, and cakes. He is not fat but the temptation is sometimes overwhelming for me to stay away from his snacks. I now try to buy individual cakes, pie slices and candy. Anything that has a wrapper around it is safe from me except for the cookies. Haven't figured that one out yet. I also have given up baking and cooking. Sounds terrible but I find that if I buy a steak for one, small cups of mashed potatoes, rice and soups put out by Bear Creek, there is less food left over and I finish whatever my husband doesn't eat. Sometimes I do cave in and raid the snacks but not as often as I did before and it gives me better control over what I eat. I recently found out the my husband loves granola bars and I am going to try to give him a half bar of one in place of the cookies so that problem will be solved. And as far as exercising, I am fortunate that my son comes over 4 or 5 times a week and we hit the treadmill in the exercise room in our building. If it wasn't for that, I would be a serious couch potatoe in the evenings.
I think the biggest problem people have is stress causes hunger - or something which feels like hunger and it's very easy through a horrendously busy day to lose track of what's already been consumed. Asking the questions: Am I really hungry or am I sad? Am I hungry or am I just thirsty? Thirst can sometimes trick someone into eating, so drinking a lot of water really does make people eat less. And I think the biggest problem caregivers have is losing track of what they've eaten already that day and believing they really "haven't had that much." We are so focused on providing care that we lose track of ourselves and we give in to what may or may not be legit hunger. I gained 10 lbs (at least) and I'm struggling to lose. Would have been better not to have gained it in the first place but our situation suddenly immersed me.
Hi Everyone, Was reading the posts and just had to add my "two cents". When I met my honey 30 years ago I weighed 98lbs (nope not married, not even common law). I have gained and lost and gained again over the years. (yep yo-yo syndrome...ha, ha,ha). But after my weight topping out at 206lbs I decided this had to go and started pushing away from the table when I would start feeling full. Just before my honey went in the hospital in May I had gotten down to 196lbs. Since he went into the hospital and subsequently rehab, I am now down to 183lb. My secret... I am eating lighter since I am not cooking for two (high protein/low sodium due to heart issue-snacks? not so much) As to snacking, I still do, but I just try to limit the amount of whatever I am snacking on. I am unable to anything as to exercise other than stretching exercises and chair exercise with light weights due to my back though that is improving and I hope to start walking short distances outside before too long. I do not have a high metabolism as mine is non-existent and I have a hormone imbalance due to a hysterectomy at age 23.
I feel so much better since I have dropped the 23lbs. Weighed this morning and I have leveled of and am holding that weight (183lbs) but at least I am not gaining. Hoping that I can start losing more soon though I know I will never get back to 98lbs, if I can get down to 136lbs (upper end of where I should be) I will be happy.
Everyone, I don't know how old everyone is (I am on the downhill side headed toward 67), but I was told by my doctor that due to my age, bone structure and height(4' 10 3/4") I should not try to get below 123lbs. She said as I age I should not try to get back to the weight that I was in my 20's and 30's that I should carry a little more than I did at that time. Dr also told me throw away the scales and use a tape measure. I do still weigh as I have heart failure and have to monitor my weight to make sure that I don't gain fluid I just don't do it daily unless I can tell I am gaining fluid.
When I get too stressed I work on my art. (I am a digital animal portrait artist and illustrator) My suggestion is if you have a hobby work on it when you are stressed. If you are snacking with the person that you are caring for, don't deprive yourself. Have those favorite snacks, but also alternate with some healthier snacks (ie: one night ice cream, the next maybe carrots with ranch dressing...that type of thing). Do what works best for you. (took me years to figure that out)
Don't give up, but don't stress about it. Stress will put weight on you as well. (have been reading some articles about it). And for Heaven's sake, don't look down on yourself or beat yourself up if you have gained weight. Oh, another thing my doctor told me? Get down to a weight that YOU feel comfortable with. Not what everyone else thinks you should be. (she was a wise lady).
The human body evolved with numerous stresses daily that it can deal with but when a 'super-stresser' happens then the body goes into self-protection mode - as this was often a famine/food shortage so I believe the body becomes out of balance & hoards calories more than normal - this means the body is becoming more effecient in absorbing food
Hematomichrosis is an inherited disease found mainly in people of northern European descent that the absorbs iron too effectively - this means women stay fertile in times of famine but is a silent killer to men & older women with iron being deposited in the internal organs - that is how some evolved to cope with super-stress events so the body probably has others too
But we need food as fuel to deal with our super-stressing loved ones - maybe seek a dietitian that could help you balance your food intake - make changes slowly & maybe buy vegetables or fruit that are pre-cut on a tray for more sensible snacking if time is a factor
Your body probably sees the stress you are under as a threat to your safety so it has adjusted but not how you would like with weight gain - at least you are aware of it & can modify your eating habits - you can't eat what is not in the house so shop after a meal when you can & make a list & stick to it - we plan our meal about 3 or 4 days in advance so that we can do extras to make a meal later in the week without much prep eg we roast a whole chicken on Tues so that we have the other half on Thurs with different side dishes - good luck
Stress releases hormones that encourage your body to hang on to weight. I found the section on weight control in Christiane Northrup's book 'The Wisdom of Menopause' helpful. Also, Maria Emmerich's 'Secrets to a Healthy Metabolism'.
Dusti22, I am not far behind you age-wise :) and a little taller but you have some really good ideas! And I had totally forgotten what you said about the scales and tape measure.... that is what I had done as well.... thanks for the reminder...
I think the best ability you could gain would be the ability to find a good care facility for mom and get back to your life. I would not want any of my kids to put their lives on hold for me.
Hi Debby1, Sorry to hear about your situation :( My heart goes out to you! My suggestion would be when you're feeling stressed out, have you tried video games? I've never been a big gamer but I find it does help to cope with stress. There's a lot of free games you can play on your phone to keep you entertained and out of the refridge. My current favorite is Puzzles and Dragons. I agree with the other suggestions of having a stationary bike in the house. It's definitely a good way to get some exercise and not have to worry about leaving the house.
Sandy16: "I think I crave the sugar in the rubbish I eat as it gives me a little lift and it takes my mind off constantly repeating the same conversations. It’s bad enough hating the turn that my life has taken but I hate what I see in my mirror too. I don’t feel like I have the time or the energy to look after myself. People always say “make sure to look after yourself”, how am I supposed to do that when my life is consumed by caring for my mum? Shall I skip her meal and meds and pop off to an exercise class or maybe not worry about her medical appointments and go for a nice walk."
After I've been with my mother for any length of time, I feel so stressed and anxious that my mind turns to carbs and sugar.
Sandy, you are so right about the "take time for yourself" advice. Easily said, not easily done. And I'm someone that needs a LOT of time for myself. As in HOURS.
I sympathize. When you're constantly stressed, and isolated, what else is there to comfort you besides food and maybe tv, or games, a book, or some other distraction.
So maybe you can improve your distraction game a bit so you get comfort that isn't from calorie intake. What kind of games do you like to play? Can you find some new ones online that are of interest to you and turn to those instead of your next snack when you get stressed out? Homemade green veggie juices are surprisingly filling in my experience, and they are low calorie while being extremely nutritious so they do satisfy cravings, too, in my experience.
There's a documentary called Fat, Sick, and Nearly Dead that is widely available online for viewing, and it helped me during my caregiving crisis to find a way to put self care into action in my daily life. Watch that and see if anything resonates with you, and motivates you to make some changes. I personally found it very inspirational in the middle of a bad caregiving situation.
You need comfort, that much is certain, but you can find comfort in different ways, better ways for your mind and body. It's difficult to change old habits but there are online support groups, like this one! :-)
Dear Debby1 Me too!! I am in the midst of struggling with the stress/eating, so no big help yet. At night I do a self-hypnosis exercise of counting from 10 to 1 going down a staircase to a lovely location. It helps me get to sleep - I will try that with weight loss/not stress eating. Important to just keep trying. Best Wishes
I have worked with dementia pts. I find it odd the minute some meet you; you become their personal servant. I've even been ordered to bring coffee and breakfast to someone's bed. Staff wasn't even it to make breakfast yet lol. Maybe they feel more in control by ordering someone around? I know all about the micromanagement too. Makes one wonder if this is the dementia, or were they that way?
For those who like to eat, and who doesn't? Try some nice cream. Frozen bananas and various fruit. Blend separate, then mix. Keep frozen cut up banannas, raspberries, mangos and strawberries in freezer. Put in blender. It is very good. Or some sugar free jello on occassion. A baked apple with lots of cinnamon, or any frozen fruit turned into sorbet using a blender. I cut up a small watermellon, put in blender and strained. Kept in ball jar. Made watermelon smoothies and a drink. Was a great treat. It made a lot of drinks. How about weight watchers popsicles/ ice cream, or fruit bars? How about a choc p. Butter smoothie with protein powder, cocoa, a tablespoon of natural p. Butter. They also make it in a protein powder too. Add a frozen banana and it's a shake. Or a banana split using a banana cut in half, drizzled with some choc syrup. (1Tbs) and a bit of granola pieces. The choc and banana really seemed decadent. You can look up desserts for those watching weight and not feel deprived. How about that decadent coffee/tea you wanted to try but didnt. I made passionfruit tea. Was really good. You dont have to go to a coffeeshop. Youtube shows you how to do it. YouTube/Pinterest has lots of ideas for distressing & food.
If parent is up for it, take a walk around the block. Better than nothing. Tell them you both need to walk the dog lol. I know it's not always that simple. How about a good book so your mind can escape. Take a relaxing bath with a lit candle, music, ebsom salts, and good e-book, Or one that reads to you. Buy that bath additive you normally would save for special occassion. Put on some perfume after your bath. Anything to help your mind distress and escape just for a bit helps. How about a manicure at home? Add in little things to help you, even it's it's meditation for 5 mins. Sit in car and listen to fab song. You know the one that makes you feel you can take on the world.
See if you can get away to a park, or meet with a friend for coffee, or a meal. How about a check in ph call? You have to take care of yourself too. The littlest thing can help you distress. If you don't, your health will suffer too. Good luck.
Debby: Are you sure that you didn't inherit a hereditary thyroid factor from your mother? I did. I was never overweight until I inherited Hypothyroidism from my late mother. I was always a size 10-12 till I zoomed up to size 16. So although my daily caloric intake is not high, I can only lose a few pounds, even with exercise.
I gained over 50 lbs, doing a year of care taking through two major surgeries and rehabs, and all the drama, drama, with family and ambulance chasers (Dad would imply he was multi millionaire and was neglected by terrible daughter so he'd be ensured of lots of lavish attention. Meanwhile, "terrible" daughter had to literally jog about to keep up with hospital, rehab, AL assortment of timetables to coordinate care, before discharge.
A hospital vending machine diet is not great for the waistline. And the worst part was after awhile I grew to crave that food because of the sugar hit. I was so burnt out that the tiny sugar lift would be sometimes all I had to look forward to. :(
I've found that avoiding alcohol, sugar, refined carbs makes a world of difference. And OA, Alanon, etc helps for support. Not crazy about the occasional cultish group think, but there are a lot of lovely supportive people in those groups and some of the reading makes a ton of sense to inspire positive self care.
The other thing is I found that I had to plan and carry food with me. If I let my blood sugar dip too low, I found that I'd almost have to eat sugary junk to get my blood sugar back up. It became a vicious circle! Not good.
If appropriate, go out walking with your loved one, especially if it can be big gardens with manageable hills and such--it'll be a good workout for you (I push Mom in a wheelchair) and a nice outing for him/her (if s/he is mobile, find places with lots of benches for rest spots or bring a portable chair--some can be folded into its own "container" that you can sling across your shoulder or carry on your back). If you're able to, cut out sugars, especially processed sugars and gradually lower carbs and processed foods. It will be hard, but I've pretty much cut out sugars (still eat fruits) and lost weight. I snack on fruits, all kinds of nuts, celery, salads galore (with avocados), hummus, popcorn and the occasional bag of pork rinds (I know that sounds bad but it has no carbs so it's better than a bag of potato chips; I usually buy the kind without the fried out fat). Not easy, especially in the beginning but once you're on track, you'll lose weight and it's healthy for whoever you're caregiving (as a supplement to the main entrees s/he is eating).
I'm a stress eater, too. What works for me is not to deny myself but remind myself that the first 2-3 bites of anything are the most satisfying. Also it takes 20 minutes for your stomach to communicate to your head that you are full, so make your meals last 20 minutes. Perhaps your mother's doctor can suggest something to help your mom at night? For you, ear-plugs. I can't remember the last time I got a full, uninterrupted 8 hour sleep but I can remember feeling good and able to cope because of it. God bless the caregivers.
Walking someplace away from traffic and general city hum is a great mood adjuster. Dogs are great motivators. If you don't have one, borrow one from a busy neighbor. The dog will love you for it.
Myownlife, I also have a long road ahead of me to lose weight which is my own fault. One of the benefits of taking care of my father is that he doesn't like big quantities of food at meals, so I am getting a better feel for what is a normal sized portion. I've been reading labels for awhile and have limits in my head on sugar and sodium content, and I have always liked vegetables/fruits. I just have to make them more convenient as snacks and not yield to the brightly colored fat/sugar temptations in the stores. (What if candy had to be wrapped in gray or brown paper?) Try roasting/grilling your vegetables?
I say think of yourself first. No sleep will lead to great health problems and then where will your mom be? It is a difficult decision, but sometimes things just get out of our control. After 6 yrs of caregiving for my mom, my health is shot. Please don’t do that to yourself. A memory facility can take care of her and you can be her daughter again and visit her. Gain your health back.
You could try a college student, family member, friend or adult day care if you need a break. Don't feel guilty either. No one wants to be attached at the hip to another person. We all need some self preservation time.
Thank you all for all the suggestions and insights. I got the Lose It! app for my phone. I type in what I eat on the app. I got through today without any junk food. My husband and mother both eat junk food and I started out dipping into their goodies. They will not give up the junk food (I have asked). I have the UP device I attach to my shoe so, I can see how many steps I take. I am making hubby watch mom while I walk the dog. I am using the treadmill in the basement with a baby monitor. I will be checking about adult daycare. It's $60 a day here for adult daycare, but I have to see if they will take her from time to time. I joined an accountability group on another site so I can get back to where I was and maybe even thinner. I have requested hospital bed for her with full railings. She got up out of bed one night and went to sleep on the couch and peed on the couch. The other night she fell out of bed. I currently have a twin mattress up against her bed with the backs of some heavy dining room chairs holding the mattress in place. The other long side of the bed is up against the wall. I had her in a nursing home; however, she claimed abuse and looked like she might be ready to pass on. I thought I would bring her to my house to pass on. Well, of course she got better. LOL
Debby1, I've been told my dad was about to pass on any minute for the past eight years Of course I don't want him to die before his time to go, but because I thought he didn't have but a few more days, multiple times over past years, I did not pace myself. I ended up completely burnt out and he got better. Now I realize that isnt as unusual as I thought. Wish someone has told me :/
Hi All...just thought of something. For those who want to try a diet rather than just pushing back, the best one I have ever found was the Diabetic Exchange diet. This is good for both diabetics and non-diabetics. You have to measure your food but you never and I repeat never go hungry. Be sure though if you try it talk to your doctor who can give the ok and let you know what the proper proportions are specifically for you. As I said, I never went hungry when I was on that diet. You eat three meals and have snacks in between and then in the evening and it is using regular food.
Debby1... it is all the excellent care you gave Mom that helped her improve. That is a good thing. But I understand it is frustrating for you at times. You need r & r and "me" time too. Adult day care is a good idea. Is Mom Medicare age? (sorry did not see it in the post..may have missed it). If she is check to see if Medicare will pay for adult day care. I believe they will pay for intermittent caregiver. Might be worth checking in to so that you and your husband can have a periodic break to take a breath and relax. Hope this helped. Have a great night and Sunday!
Me too! I gained about 60 lbs since I moved in with mom after my dad died, back then she just needed light supervision, but the best way to lift her mood was to offer her ice cream (her house was always ice cream central, with several varieties available at all times), and of course I had to eat some with her. now, 12 years later, I no longer keep ice cream in the house, but she is completely immobile and helpless, and I sit a lot, by her bedside to feed her what she will eat between periods of sleeping. I have to stay there so I can catch her when she wakes up so I can feed her some more. And they say sitting is the new smoking. She would get dehydrated and waste away if I didn't do that. The only thing that gets me to exercise is my little angel dog/ gift from God that I try to take for walks several times a week (I know it should be more frequent but this is the best I can do at the moment. I hope to do it more often). They say even 15 min a day is helpful. So, my suggestion is, maybe offer to walk a neighbor's dog if you don't have one.
Also, I just saw a documentary tonight on NHK (a Japanese station - they often have medical and technological advances that we haven't heard about yet) about "ghost capillaries", or capillaries that die due to a number of factors like inactivity, excess carbs in the diet, etc. they said these contribute to dementia, osteoporosis, cold hands and feet, diabetes, and liver and kidney problems, because the capillaries are where the blood stream delivers oxygen and nutrients to the brain, the organs and bones. I know- Downer, right? But the good news is, doing a certain exercise for only a couple of weeks resulted in huge improvement. Guess what the exercise is.... SKIPPING! Skipping in place, 20 reps, 3 times per day was all it took. (or, even, actually skipping around the house, or, if you don't mind looking silly, go skipping outside, instead of walking). And, if that's not possible, rising up on your toes, while standing or sitting, 20 reps 3 times per day gets similar results. Because it exercises the calf muscles, which are the second way of circulating the blood, after the heart, and increasing the circulation even that much saves the capillaries. And, hey, I can do that while I'm sitting by mom's bed! One woman in the study said it removed the swelling in her legs, and I could use that benefit as well! And, diet-wise, there were 3 things (in addition to cutting back on carbs) they found protected the capillaries: 1 teaspoon of cinnamon per day, 1 cup of Rooibos tea per day (I hope it tastes good, I've never had it, but I'm gonna try it) and "long" pepper. I'll have to see if the Sprouts store where I get D-Mannose supplements for mom's battle against uti's carries these things. I know I'm rambling here, but I'm thinking, if one can do these small things, it might improve one's health and energy level, and increase their ability and motivation to be more active and healthy in general, which would help with losing weight, and even help avoid getting this horrible disease that's taking our loved ones. I'm gonna try this approach, and I'll keep you posted about any improvements I experience. If anyone else tries it, please keep me posted, as well. Well, I think I'll get started right now, and skip back to mom's room to give her her dinner, and while there, I'll rise up on my toes 20 times!
Was reading the posts and just had to add my "two cents". When I met my honey 30 years ago I weighed 98lbs (nope not married, not even common law). I have gained and lost and gained again over the years. (yep yo-yo syndrome...ha, ha,ha). But after my weight topping out at 206lbs I decided this had to go and started pushing away from the table when I would start feeling full. Just before my honey went in the hospital in May I had gotten down to 196lbs. Since he went into the hospital and subsequently rehab, I am now down to 183lb. My secret... I am eating lighter since I am not cooking for two (high protein/low sodium due to heart issue-snacks? not so much) As to snacking, I still do, but I just try to limit the amount of whatever I am snacking on. I am unable to anything as to exercise other than stretching exercises and chair exercise with light weights due to my back though that is improving and I hope to start walking short distances outside before too long. I do not have a high metabolism as mine is non-existent and I have a hormone imbalance due to a hysterectomy at age 23.
I feel so much better since I have dropped the 23lbs. Weighed this morning and I have leveled of and am holding that weight (183lbs) but at least I am not gaining. Hoping that I can start losing more soon though I know I will never get back to 98lbs, if I can get down to 136lbs (upper end of where I should be) I will be happy.
Everyone, I don't know how old everyone is (I am on the downhill side headed toward 67), but I was told by my doctor that due to my age, bone structure and height(4' 10 3/4") I should not try to get below 123lbs. She said as I age I should not try to get back to the weight that I was in my 20's and 30's that I should carry a little more than I did at that time. Dr also told me throw away the scales and use a tape measure. I do still weigh as I have heart failure and have to monitor my weight to make sure that I don't gain fluid I just don't do it daily unless I can tell I am gaining fluid.
When I get too stressed I work on my art. (I am a digital animal portrait artist and illustrator) My suggestion is if you have a hobby work on it when you are stressed. If you are snacking with the person that you are caring for, don't deprive yourself. Have those favorite snacks, but also alternate with some healthier snacks (ie: one night ice cream, the next maybe carrots with ranch dressing...that type of thing). Do what works best for you. (took me years to figure that out)
Don't give up, but don't stress about it. Stress will put weight on you as well. (have been reading some articles about it). And for Heaven's sake, don't look down on yourself or beat yourself up if you have gained weight. Oh, another thing my doctor told me? Get down to a weight that YOU feel comfortable with. Not what everyone else thinks you should be. (she was a wise lady).
Y'all have a great day and weekend! (smile)
Hematomichrosis is an inherited disease found mainly in people of northern European descent that the absorbs iron too effectively - this means women stay fertile in times of famine but is a silent killer to men & older women with iron being deposited in the internal organs - that is how some evolved to cope with super-stress events so the body probably has others too
But we need food as fuel to deal with our super-stressing loved ones - maybe seek a dietitian that could help you balance your food intake - make changes slowly & maybe buy vegetables or fruit that are pre-cut on a tray for more sensible snacking if time is a factor
Your body probably sees the stress you are under as a threat to your safety so it has adjusted but not how you would like with weight gain - at least you are aware of it & can modify your eating habits - you can't eat what is not in the house so shop after a meal when you can & make a list & stick to it - we plan our meal about 3 or 4 days in advance so that we can do extras to make a meal later in the week without much prep eg we roast a whole chicken on Tues so that we have the other half on Thurs with different side dishes - good luck
Sorry to hear about your situation :( My heart goes out to you!
My suggestion would be when you're feeling stressed out, have you tried video games? I've never been a big gamer but I find it does help to cope with stress. There's a lot of free games you can play on your phone to keep you entertained and out of the refridge. My current favorite is Puzzles and Dragons.
I agree with the other suggestions of having a stationary bike in the house. It's definitely a good way to get some exercise and not have to worry about leaving the house.
After I've been with my mother for any length of time, I feel so stressed and anxious that my mind turns to carbs and sugar.
Sandy, you are so right about the "take time for yourself" advice. Easily said, not easily done. And I'm someone that needs a LOT of time for myself. As in HOURS.
So maybe you can improve your distraction game a bit so you get comfort that isn't from calorie intake. What kind of games do you like to play? Can you find some new ones online that are of interest to you and turn to those instead of your next snack when you get stressed out? Homemade green veggie juices are surprisingly filling in my experience, and they are low calorie while being extremely nutritious so they do satisfy cravings, too, in my experience.
There's a documentary called Fat, Sick, and Nearly Dead that is widely available online for viewing, and it helped me during my caregiving crisis to find a way to put self care into action in my daily life. Watch that and see if anything resonates with you, and motivates you to make some changes. I personally found it very inspirational in the middle of a bad caregiving situation.
You need comfort, that much is certain, but you can find comfort in different ways, better ways for your mind and body. It's difficult to change old habits but there are online support groups, like this one! :-)
Me too!! I am in the midst of struggling with the stress/eating, so no big help yet. At night I do a self-hypnosis exercise of counting from 10 to 1 going down a staircase to a lovely location. It helps me get to sleep - I will try that with weight loss/not stress eating. Important to just keep trying.
Best Wishes
Makes one wonder if this is the dementia, or were they that way?
For those who like to eat, and who doesn't? Try some nice cream. Frozen bananas and various fruit. Blend separate, then mix. Keep frozen cut up banannas, raspberries, mangos and strawberries in freezer. Put in blender. It is very good. Or some sugar free jello on occassion. A baked apple with lots of cinnamon, or any frozen fruit turned into sorbet using a blender. I cut up a small watermellon, put in blender and strained. Kept in ball jar. Made watermelon smoothies and a drink. Was a great treat. It made a lot of drinks.
How about weight watchers popsicles/ ice cream, or fruit bars? How about a choc p. Butter smoothie with protein powder, cocoa, a tablespoon of natural p. Butter. They also make it in a protein powder too. Add a frozen banana and it's a shake. Or a banana split using a banana cut in half, drizzled with some choc syrup. (1Tbs) and a bit of granola pieces. The choc and banana really seemed decadent. You can look up desserts for those watching weight and not feel deprived.
How about that decadent coffee/tea you wanted to try but didnt. I made passionfruit tea. Was really good. You dont have to go to a coffeeshop. Youtube shows you how to do it. YouTube/Pinterest has lots of ideas for distressing & food.
If parent is up for it, take a walk around the block. Better than nothing. Tell them you both need to walk the dog lol. I know it's not always that simple.
How about a good book so your mind can escape. Take a relaxing bath with a lit candle, music, ebsom salts, and good e-book, Or one that reads to you. Buy that bath additive you normally would save for special occassion. Put on some perfume after your bath. Anything to help your mind distress and escape just for a bit helps. How about a manicure at home? Add in little things to help you, even it's it's meditation for 5 mins. Sit in car and listen to fab song. You know the one that makes you feel you can take on the world.
See if you can get away to a park, or meet with a friend for coffee, or a meal. How about a check in ph call?
You have to take care of yourself too. The littlest thing can help you distress. If you don't, your health will suffer too. Good luck.
rehabs, and all the drama, drama, with family and ambulance chasers (Dad would
imply he was multi millionaire and was neglected by terrible daughter so he'd be ensured of lots of lavish attention. Meanwhile, "terrible" daughter had to literally jog
about to keep up with hospital, rehab, AL assortment of timetables to coordinate care, before discharge.
A hospital vending machine diet is not great for the waistline. And the worst part was
after awhile I grew to crave that food because of the sugar hit. I was so burnt out
that the tiny sugar lift would be sometimes all I had to look forward to. :(
I've found that avoiding alcohol, sugar, refined carbs makes a world of difference.
And OA, Alanon, etc helps for support. Not crazy about the occasional cultish group think, but there are a lot of lovely supportive people in those groups and some of the reading makes a ton of sense to inspire positive self care.
The other thing is I found that I had to plan and carry food with me. If I let my blood
sugar dip too low, I found that I'd almost have to eat sugary junk to get my blood sugar
back up. It became a vicious circle! Not good.
I have requested hospital bed for her with full railings. She got up out of bed one night and went to sleep on the couch and peed on the couch. The other night she fell out of bed. I currently have a twin mattress up against her bed with the backs of some heavy dining room chairs holding the mattress in place. The other long side of the bed is up against the wall.
I had her in a nursing home; however, she claimed abuse and looked like she might be ready to pass on. I thought I would bring her to my house to pass on. Well, of course she got better. LOL
Of course I don't want him to die before his time to go, but because I thought he didn't
have but a few more days, multiple times over past years, I did not pace myself. I ended
up completely burnt out and he got better. Now I realize that isnt as unusual as I thought. Wish someone has told me :/
Also, I just saw a documentary tonight on NHK (a Japanese station - they often have medical and technological advances that we haven't heard about yet) about "ghost capillaries", or capillaries that die due to a number of factors like inactivity, excess carbs in the diet, etc. they said these contribute to dementia, osteoporosis, cold hands and feet, diabetes, and liver and kidney problems, because the capillaries are where the blood stream delivers oxygen and nutrients to the brain, the organs and bones. I know- Downer, right? But the good news is, doing a certain exercise for only a couple of weeks resulted in huge improvement. Guess what the exercise is.... SKIPPING! Skipping in place, 20 reps, 3 times per day was all it took. (or, even, actually skipping around the house, or, if you don't mind looking silly, go skipping outside, instead of walking). And, if that's not possible, rising up on your toes, while standing or sitting, 20 reps 3 times per day gets similar results. Because it exercises the calf muscles, which are the second way of circulating the blood, after the heart, and increasing the circulation even that much saves the capillaries. And, hey, I can do that while I'm sitting by mom's bed! One woman in the study said it removed the swelling in her legs, and I could use that benefit as well! And, diet-wise, there were 3 things (in addition to cutting back on carbs) they found protected the capillaries: 1 teaspoon of cinnamon per day, 1 cup of Rooibos tea per day (I hope it tastes good, I've never had it, but I'm gonna try it) and "long" pepper. I'll have to see if the Sprouts store where I get D-Mannose supplements for mom's battle against uti's carries these things. I know I'm rambling here, but I'm thinking, if one can do these small things, it might improve one's health and energy level, and increase their ability and motivation to be more active and healthy in general, which would help with losing weight, and even help avoid getting this horrible disease that's taking our loved ones. I'm gonna try this approach, and I'll keep you posted about any improvements I experience. If anyone else tries it, please keep me posted, as well. Well, I think I'll get started right now, and skip back to mom's room to give her her dinner, and while there, I'll rise up on my toes 20 times!