My wife has had an urine problem for about a year. Now she is defacating in her pants on occasions. This is causing enormous problems. Is their anything I can do to prevent this? If this continues I don't think I can continue to be her sole caregiver.
Being a caregiver for my wife was the toughest thing I ever did. But we all have our limits of caregiving. If her incontinence is your limit, please contact your Area Agency on Aging, Alzheimer's Assn., or your state Dept of Aging to get other helpful information. Please know that you are doing your best to care for her and will always be her advocate and look out for her wellbeing.
Have you talked to social services to see if she qualifies for any assistance? Contact your local counsel on aging and they can help you navigate through this difficult situation.
Please know that it is okay if you can no longer provide her the care she needs. They truly do get to a point that it takes a village to care for them. When that time comes you can get back to being her husband and advocate, and being there for her, which is so difficult when you are the caregiver.
I hope that the incontinence products solve your problem.
I have an aide that comes every morning to put my bedridden husband on the bedside commode, so he can poop. She holds him up when he's done so I can get him cleaned up, and then she puts him back in the bed. Perhaps having an aide come in an hour or 2 every day might be helpful for you too. There is nothing easy about being a caregiver. I wish you the very best.