I am a 60-yr-old disabled lady. I have chronic back pain from a herniated disc, left side hip pain and left knee replacement gone wrong. I agreed to take in my older sister who has liver failure with ascites. She had a 5% chance of surviving. I went through midnight diaper changing to middle of the night cleaning up vomit. I had to change bedding and clean her up all while I had my own excruciating pain to deal with. Now that my sister is miraculously getting better she is now reluctant to give me monthly pay for her care. I need to know just how much would she be paying monthly for the 24/7 care she needs? Including meals, snacks, special drinks she likes and I am responsible for her medications to be distributed to her.
Get her evaluated by Medicaid to see if she can get some "in home" help. If she can afford it, time for an Assited living or she pays for caregivers. You took her in because u thought she was dying. Seems for now she isn't. It is not your responsibility to pay her way especially if your suffering financially. Do not disable her. Make her do what she physically can.
If she refuses to do any of these things, then tell her time to find her own place because you cannot care for her indefinitely.
You may want to talk to your sister about moving out and going into an assisted living facility or calling in home care. Or she can continue to live with you and she can pay a caregiver in to help her since she is balking at the idea of paying you.
What might have made a difference was BEFORE you moved in your older sister you attended an hour of time with an elder law attorney and drew up a contract for care. You would include cost of rental, food, food prep and personal care.
You have chosen instead to move in your Sister and care for her free of charge.
You should both see that attorney now. If your sister is unable (sounds as tho she is in dire circumstances, then have an attorney home visit arranged.
If you cannot provide the care, and are not paid for the care, then Sister should move into placement for her care. If you need assistance call APS with seniors in crisis, and they will try to guide you to help for your sister.
The cost of a nursing home is at least $12k a month. If you were to hire someone to come into your home to care for your sister 24/7 at $25/hr, that cost would be $300 for the first 12 hour shift, and then you'd probably be able to pay someone $150 for the night shift, so, $450 a day for 24 hr per day care, or, $13,500 per month. That's a rough estimate, but a good number to give your sister as an idea of what it would cost her to hire someone. That figure does NOT include food or special drinks she likes or supplies of any kind, either; just the care.
Good luck!