My dad has Alzheimer’s he is 88 and my mom is 82 and she is having hard time caring for my dad. What is out there that doesn’t cost a lot to help her with cleaning house and helping him with showers, maybe give them advice as to how things could be better during night so she can sleep? He wants her all the time and gets angry if she leaves to go do grocery shopping. Doesn’t want anyone to stay with him to give her time for herself.
I would take this situation very seriously. We're told that up to one in three caregivers dies before the person he or she is caring for; and given that your poor mother is 82 and currently unable to rest or sleep I would have thought that she must be at even higher risk - and then what will become of your father? I don't mean to depress or frighten you; but if your mother is reluctant to seek help and be firm about it, that might be a point of view you could tactfully put to her.
Meanwhile, and just for your own information perhaps, have you had a look at what sort of facilities might be a possibility for your father if/when the time comes? Or for respite care? It's good to get the details together in advance so that if anything happens that makes the home situation impossible you already know where to start.