She is always talking to people and she takes off her diaper and wet the bed, she has severe constipation every week now. She gets angry at me because she don't want to take her medicine or eat sometimes, she remember all of her other children except for me. She doesn't want to stay with me but her other children don't want to be bothered at all. They keep her part of Friday and all day Saturday abd part of Sunday while I go to church and they rush me to pick her back up do that they can go on with there life. I know this is a lot but I just need some help and hope. I know God is watching all of this but what am I suppose to do. I don't slerp well because she gets up all times of the night looking for knives because she think someone is out to hurt her. I am really afraid in my own house, but I promised her in 200- when she had her first stroke I wouldn't put her in a home. Some one please help me.
Your mother is advancing in her dementia. The exact stage is only something that a doctor can determine but that isn't the issue here. The issue is that you have no help and can't keep this up.
Many people have made the promise that you've made only to find that they can't keep it. For your mother's sake as well as for your own, you need to get help. You've honored the spirit of the promise. It's time to move forward. Look for a good nursing home and then spend a lot of time with her there. They can do the hard physical work while you take care of her emotional needs and go back to being her daughter.
You may find it helpful to read this article: https://www.agingcare.com/articles/I-promised-my-parents-I-d-never-put-them-in-a-nursing-home-133904.htm
Please keep us posted on how you are doing.
Carol
We have the best of intentions when we begin caring for our parents in their old age but there are times when they need more help than we can provide. That your mom's paranoia (classic symptom of dementia) causes her to want to arm herself with a knife is a very dangerous situation. My suggestion would be to call 911 the next time she gets agitated and goes for the knives. Once she's in the hospital you can request a social worker and together you two can find a facility that's better suited to care for your mom. I fear that she's a danger to herself and others at this point and should be in a controlled environment where she doesn't have access to weapons.
I'm sorry you have to go through this.