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I am still working our business FT and my wife has entered the early moderate stage of Alzheimer's disease. Symptoms started in 2018 and official diagnosis was December 2021. We have interviewed home care companies and are vetting dementia specialty day care centers as options. Whichever my wife thrives in is the direction we will go. Either option still creates a need for me to handle the numerous home chores such as cooking, shopping, cleaning between cleaning company visits, etc., in addition to my home repair maintenance duties.I feel the option of having a full-time live-in caretaker, in lieu of the day care option, who could help my wife and take care of some of the chores would help me do the best for my wife. We would open our home to have someone have a place to live and also be paid without rent, food, costs.Has anyone gone through this before and have suggestions about where to find a trustworthy person as well as ideas to make this successful?Thank you for any advice. Just want the best for my girl (married 46 years) and want to keep her out of a facility until the very end stage. Have a blessed day!

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I would not advise this. For one, a live in is necessarily homeless otherwise and once they get privileges to use your address on anything that’s proof of them living there. So now you have a tenant that can fight you if things don’t work out.

Second, free room and board is not barterable for someone who has to be around or on call for all your wife’s dementia needs plus she’s supposed to be a maintenance man?
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Reply to PeggySue2020
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This sounds good but may prove nearly impossible to find in reality. My family tried a live in caregiver years ago when my grandmother was dealing with dementia, like you, wanting to keep her in her beloved home and familiar surroundings. Most of the applicants, and the lady who was hired, proved to be people in pretty dire circumstances themselves. Though a background check was done, and there weren’t problems with her work, there were still issues with her life situation that invariably bled over into the job. Transportation issues for her days off, her own extended family issues, requesting advances on pay, “something came up” etc.
I would encourage you to consider several helpers, with defined roles for each, and hopefully also find an adult day program you feel good about. Most importantly, as this is an enormous undertaking, practice self care. You’re no good to your wife if you’re burned out and not healthy. She’s blessed to have you in her corner
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Reply to Daughterof1930
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40 hours a week plus overtime after 40 hours to folow state laws. You will need workers comp insurance and hand out tax forms. Then offer to charge a low rent to live in. The caregiver will need to be paid so as to own a car and get out on days off. Anything less will be considered slavery.
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Reply to MACinCT
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