Our mother began showing signs of dementia two years ago but our father became ill throughout the year and then passed away. Because of my Dad's condition, my Mom's mental decline was put on the back burner because my Dad was the best one to talk to her about it and we were waiting for his health to improve to do so. Now, no one has approached our Mom with her obvious decline because of her hostile moods and withdrawal when it's brought up. We had her scheduled to see a geriatric psychiatrist to make a diagnosis and hopefully, use some meds to slow her progression, but Mom refused to keep her appointment. Now, it's not safe for her to be driving and we're concerned about her safety with living alone. Is there someone available to give us some professional advice about how to handle this situation and what would work best?
I am sure that one of the resident EXPERTs on this website will add more information. I am not an expert, just another caregiver such as yourself.
It is imperative that you get some help for your mother. Have a family meeting (with ALL available family members... sister... brothers... cousins... aunts... uncles) and discuss what should be done.
Please. God bless.
You mentioned your mother's "hostile moods". I would advise you to not allow such moods to intimidate you into backing down and not doing anything. We were afraid of my father's combativeness and potential for rage when it was time to tell him he needed to stop driving. But we had to have courage and tell him anyway. Predictably, he became very angry, but he eventually calmed down when he realized we weren't going to be changing our mind. It was the right decision and safer for him and everybody else on the road when he stopped driving.
Good luck to you.
I am hoping that IHERZING1 will be able to get the help needed from local agencies, and that "Mom" will not be left alone OR able to drive. God Bless.
It seems the first thing is to contact the Secretary of State about requesting a driving assessment but when I look at the web site they say they won't take an anonymous referral. That's worrisome because we don't want our Mother to start out in all this being furious that we've taken her license away but as many of you have said, we'll do what we have to do.