My mother has been very active and mobile until about 1 year ago. Her memory is bad; she can hardly walk because of swelling in her legs and ankles. She is very mean to my father and says very hurtful things. I took her to her Dr. and he said 'there is no set testing for dementia'. SO, what do we do now? My dad is at his witts end and she has been saying very hurtful things and now helping in any way with household work or cooking. She basically just sits.
Understanding the Dementia Experience by Jennifer Ghent-Fuller, B.A., R.N., M.Sc.N.
The information it contains is invaluable and will help you understand what is going on. Talk to a SPECIALIST that deals with dementia conditions.
Please understand that if she is having problems with her memory its not that she doesn't want to help, but perhaps she cannot remember HOW to do things! Sometimes this behavior presents as someone being MEAN, but in reality it their inability to know WHAT to do!