A resident at Mom's nursing home is yelling for help night & day for no reason. Anyone have experience with this?

Management of the facility should be telling this womans family that she needs additional care and meds and that they cannot continue to let her disrupt every other resident. Maybe her family should come spend the day with her to see how disruptive it is to everyone else. If her family is uncooperative they should tell them she has to move out. At the very least they should be moving this woman to be surrounded by other residents with similar outbursts or next to someone who can't hear....Your mom has a right to a peaceful place to live. This womans rights do not trump your moms rights.

If the facility is not willing to act on this, I would be looking for another facility for my mom to live.

Move your Mom to a place that with better problem management — one that naturally respects the peaceful existence of the majority of its residents over the unreasonable demands of one irrational patient.

If you “fight” this current situation, the next unpredictable problem will be lurking around the corner.

Oh My I am so sorry. My mom would be so anxious listening to that!! Keep going to the administrator…put it in writing also. I might even record the non stop noise. Dementia patients need peace and quiet to remain calm and happy…..so unfair to others. It is not the families decision to move her it is admins job to make those decisions. It also takes care away from others while cnas chase to see what that “help” is all about…maybe a call to the State would push management to take action!!! Good Luck..

This was my mom. Constantly screaming for help. Calling staff *******. Calling my sister and I $&****. Telling us we didn’t love her and she didn’t love us. Very out of character for my docile, happy and always smiling mom. Turns out she had a bladder infection. Once she was put on antibiotics, the infection cleared up and mom returned to her loving self. We now know what to look for and we react quickly is she seems “off”.

Can your mother wear ear plugs & play a radio 📻. 📺 tv , or boom box music 🎵 🎼 ?
My mother went through various stages when she talked all night & would get into yelling/screaming matches w invisible people she saw but I didn’t. I bought a box of ear plugs, played radio louder & closed door of her room, put pillow over my ears….you get picture? Then she tired exhausted & slept quiet all next day. Hugs 🤗

I know that sounds like a lot is going on. U could address it to the head honchos. Send a certified letter addressing the issue(s)or maybe ur mother could move far down the hallway. It’s sad. I pray everything works out.

It sounds like the staff feel that she needs to be in memory care. Your mother's neighbor is going through a stage that may eventually pass. But in the meantime, it must be very disturbing for your mother to have to hear that. Can you talk to your mother's case manager at the facility about whether something can be done to make it more pleasant for your mother? Could your mother close her door? Would it be helpful to ask if your mother could move to a different room? Moves are hard for seniors. It may be better to try to find ways to mitigate the situation. What about playing music in your mother's room, like a white noise?

Nina1965: It is imperative that your mother be moved to another room so that she can get restorative sleep. Something is amiss since this hasn't been accomplished and the staff seems reluctant to believe you. Perhaps you should go to the Ombudsman.

Take a copy of the facility's contract to a lawyer that deals with elder law. Your mother should be able to get 7-9 hours of uninterrupted sleep every night.

Yes I know the problem it was another patient in my wife’s nursing home. The story was he had been there for years and had no family. He screened all day. The staff ignored him. The kept him in a private room What a terrible way to go. My wife finally got moved down the hall. A little quieter

I have experienced this in several locations--not always in care. Once was on an all-night train from DC to Portland, Oregon. The woman should never have been taken on the train. She was confused and uncomfortable. I do not know what her problem was, but she was unable to communicate in any way but constant screaming. In this case, the steward of the train should have required the party (she was accompanied by two others) to get off the train, check into a hotel and arrange for alternate transportation. It was the fault of her family members who should have done a trial run of a few hours before subjecting the poor thing to a 36 hour ride, with no place to lie down and no place to get away from the crowds.

The other time I was subjected to constant screaming was when I was in the surgical ward of a hospital for a total knee replacement. Needless to say I got no rest while my room mate screamed the night and day. I insisted on going home a day earlier than recommended by my surgeon.

In both of these cases, the people in charge, who should have assured the peace of everyone else in such close quarters responded to complaints with "there is nowhere else to put her." In each case the rest of us were paying a lot of money to be abused.

When my aunt was in nursing care before her death there was a screamer there, too. The nurses would wheel the screaming woman to the day room in the morning and back to her bed at night, but nothing was done to make the place more comfortable for all the other residents.

I think if you bother with lawyers and courts at enormous expense you may get some sort of victory there, but in the short term, I doubt that much will happen. In my experience, a complaint about the constant noise resulted in the management casting my complaint as being "intolerant." I actually think that we are entitled to be intolerant of such unacceptable behavior. If a person cannot keep the volume of their voices down to reasonable levels they should be cared for in a separate area. The constant noise presents a health hazard for everyone else in the vicinity. You would think that would be a no-brainer in a care facility. We all need peace and quiet. Probably the one making the racket would be better off in a place where she, too, could have some peace and quiet.

The Nursing home Dr. can get a consent from patients "responsable person" for Anxiety med.

There seems to be a "yeller" at every nursing home that my mom has stayed at.

Move your mother. If this home is kowtowing too one resident’s family to this extent, your mother is in the wrong place!

We experienced this when my FIL was in a SNF.
My FIL was across the hall for three weeks from someone that yelled constantly; and we were all miserable when we visited.
This woman may need to be closer to the nursing station so they can keep a watchful eye on her, and of course you must know you have no legal recourse here - it's not hurting your Mom; just unsettling.
You could ask the nursing home management to move your Mom to another bed further away; or perhaps they can give your Mom something for her anxiety.
Sorry you are having to deal with this.

Nina1965: you mentioned they could move your Mom to a much smaller room - why not take a look at it? Much smaller may mean only one resident is in it - and wouldn't that be a plus? Residents come and go, and you'd never have to worry about an unruly one rooming with your Mom.

If they don’t move your mom, I’m wondering if you could call the ombudsman? There should be a number posted in a visible place near the entrance of the facility. Also speak to the social worker. This whole situation sounds very sad, not only for your mom, but for the other resident, who is also feeling distress.

I would demand a move. But memory care for that person may be out of reach. My mother was just moved FROM memory care into a SNF this week because she is no longer a candidate for memory care. Once there are other serious medical issues in the mix, they need skilled nursing care.

Yes I my dad had a women screaming for help in his rehab/nursing home. It was horrifying the first time I heard it. It upset him too. Made him really dislike the place. De egg med like an insane asylum. Sorry your mom has to deal with it. Seems like the facility is at fault. They are in charge and should move her on the end unit with the hearing impaired by her, really! Can you talk with other family related to those in the facility and write a letter. They must have a board over seeing them. Good luck headphones until you resolve it.

Your mother is paying rent, and as a tenant, she has a right to expect a level of peace and quiet in her home. She does not have a right to disrupt or violating other residents' rights either. The other woman is violating that part of the lease, so SHE is the one who needs to move. That's the job of the administration of the facility (as the "landlord") and not the decision of the family members of the screaming woman.

Going into the administrator's office and explaining that fact calmly and clearly might very well get the reaction you desire.

My guess is that the family and the doctor don’t hear the constant ‘help me’, which is why there are no meds prescribed and given. With the old man close to my MIL, the crying out stopped when someone went to him. ‘Simple’ think family and doctor ‘he’s not getting enough attention’. Except that 24 hour attention is not possible, and the crying out is a genuine problem for other residents.

Perhaps both family and doctor need to spend 10 minutes close but not with him. Family could be quite distressed themselves, find it hard not to rush in. Is there some way to make this happen?

Probably what the family won't allow is the use of medications to calm the woman down, which is unfortunate because I'd personally rather be doped out of my mind than live in that state of fear and agitation (and besides well managed medication doesn't have to make people into zombies).

Nina,

The nursing home staff are lying and also trying to throw in a bit of gaslighting as as well by telling you that your mother is imagining the yelling.
Nursing home staff will lie per order of their supervisors or facility owners. They will also cheat and steal (this is the business end of a nursing home).
The "we're working on a solution" is total BS. They are doing absolutely nothing except appeasing you in the moment. Here is the reason why the screaming and yelling lady is not being moved to the different room. She has better insurance than your mom. The NH wants to keep her in that room because it's more expensive than the smaller room or the memory care (if they have one in their facility). Also, the nursing home can move any resident to another room at their discretion for any resaon they want.
One day I went to visit my father in the NH. He wasn't in his room. None of his stuff was either. So I asked where he was and was told that he was moved to a different room. When I asked why I was pushed off from one person after the other because no one would give me a straight answer until I really lost my sh*t with these people.
Turns out they simply decided to downgrade him. Insurance was still paying though. They were collecting the higher rate as if he was still in higher care only he wasn't. After much back and forth with Medicare and the state I got to the bottom of it and they had to pay Medicare back. Nursing homes can and do move residents any time they want. So please don't buy that lame BS excuse that the woman's family refuses to have her moved.
I'm sure your mother isn't the only resident that's heard this lady's screaming and yelling. If she's doing it during the day too, the visiting family members of other residents probably heard her too. Talk to some of them. Put a recording device in your mother's room and record this woman screaming and yelling all night long. Then you bring that to a lawyer or to the state's Ombudsman's Office if there is one. Or the Agency on Aging.

Nina,

Are there other families willing to take this up with you? The more there are, the more pressure will be on the home to move her as they can’t possibly move all of them around.

Or at least closing the door.

Or referring the family to a geripsych who might be able to prescribe calming medication.

The more people, the more pressure.

Thank you everyone!

ask to have your Mom moved to another room. I know that is a pain to do but her sanity is worth it. The facility doesn't have the power to move the other resident

I just recently had this same problem with a woman next to my mother. She was very hard of hearing so she seemed to have no sense of how loud she was. Her niece had also told my husband that.

The SN facility offered to move her. Then a Covid outbreak of a very mild nature was delaying them. The woman was getting worse and what really bothered me is that staff never came because they were so used to her constant yelling. What further bothered me is that they would wake her up to deliver her lunch but then not help her at all to even access it. I also watched her attempt to use the toilet on her own (they shared a hallway and bathroom) and yell Help and no one came which I brought to their attention. She really did need help that time.

Besides complaining alot I got the Area County of Aging involved. It took some doing to get to the right person. She was moved the following week.

I don't understand your comment regarding her family. It is up to the facility to decide on placement within their locations as to where a resident should reside such as Memory Care.

The family may be thinking that a move might cost more but they should not be the ones who have the ultimate decision.

I would think there were meds for this and should be given. My Mom started humming and each day it got louder where it was disturbing those around her. I allowed her to be medicated.

My MIL had the same problem with a man in the room on the other side of the corridor. He called ‘help’ all his waking hours, with no need. Years of it. MIL eventually learned to block it out. No-one wants these people, next to them or in any facility, and there are no soundproofed rooms or padded cells. What can anyone do?

At the first NH I was in there was a screamer two doors down. She was still screaming at daylight and I had had no sleep. I threatened to get the paramedics to come take me to another NH if they didn't get that woman gone or move me to another room. I was in another room within an hour. One of the staff members knew me and knew I would do it so they listened. If one is paying almost $10,000 a Month you deserve peace and quiet. I made it perfectly clear what I expected from them.