My mother has been living with me in my home for two years, she is totally dependent on me she can no longer walk in a hospital bed and wheelchair, she has dementia and is getting worse and very mean to me , throws things when I don’t jump fast enough, she has a will, I have POA.
If it gets worse where I can’t no longer do it, I'm not young myself I am 65 years old and she is 89 years and if I have to put her in a NH, will the nursing home get her saving plus she has one CD stating payable to me upon her death and the rest in a regular saving account , how does all that work?
https://www.agingcare.com/questions/mom-89-with-dementia-moved-in-with-me-should-i-use-her-money-to-pay-the-bills-462448.htm?orderby=oldest&page=1
Brother living in her house, rent free, while mom paid all household bills for him will cause a Medicaid penalty. Medicaid will look at all expenditures from mom's accounts for the past five years, or 2.5 years if you happen to be lucky enough to be in California. Then the amount that bro should have paid for rent plus the money mom paid for him on the house, will be mom's penalty. Hopefully mom has not been giving money to him, or to you which will also be a penalty.
Your other brother is right. Get your other brother out of that house, sell it, put that money in mom's accounts and hopefully she will have enough to wait the five years before she needs Medicaid. Enough to self pay in assisted living or nursing home before she has to apply for Medicaid.
This is your responsibility to do as mom's POA. It could be considered a breach of fiduciary duty if other brother decides to call you on it.