She has a home in Illinois, 35 miles away from here, she can no longer stay alone, she cant grasp it, not only she cant remember asking & getting an answer within mins of the last question, I am all alone in this, she has a son which isnt no help for me at all, another ladie had been stayin with her at her home, and I get her to come here on the weekends. The Ladie has had major heart issues in past, and recently just got out of hospital from surgery on clots by her stint, I just need some guidance in any body out there has any advice for me. God blessed me with a daughter 3 years ago, all my live no suppose to happen, she is my world, and her Great Granddaughter, at times she doesnt care how she acts, but doesn't know she has, please anybody to help on some advice would be so greatly appreciated...
Is your grandma bedridden? In a wheelchair? Able to walk/dress/bathe herself?
Through medicare, your grandma can get various support.
You are a good person to take care of her, but remember, her life is coming to an end. Be sure you are not hurting your daughter or yourself. Maybe you can't make her happy, but you can tell her that you love her and will keep her safe.
What problems are you having? Is it just that she is unhappy? Does she sleep at night? Is she in pain? Does she do dangerous things like turning on the stove?
But if that's not the case, you might want to look into assisted living situations nearby you, or even a nice nursing home in the area if she's beyond assisted living? What you don't want to do is to find that love of your dear grandmother turning into resentment as she becomes increasingly dependent. Taking care of an active 3 yr old is a full time job... taking care of a dementia patient is also a full time job. Can you really take on two full time jobs?
Maybe the caretaker, when healthier, can work with your mom from your home? Just a thought... you might be able to do this with daily help.