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My Mom's been in the Hospital for the past week. The last two times I've driven to visit her there's no Handicapped spots available. I have to park on an end row to open the car door wide enough to get in & out due to knee injuries. I wind up parking a block away in the overflow parking lot because I can't open the door in the closer jammed parking lot.


I use a wheelchair at home (it won't fit in my car) and a Walker, but I have to drag one of my legs. This is way too far for me and it's dangerous for me to do as I stumble and trip and then have asthma issues from the exertion.


I have no one to drive me or drop me off, the hospital does not have a shuttle nor will provide me with assistance. I can't afford a taxi and there aren't any bus transportation options that'd take me from my rural area to the city to see her. I have asked neighbors for help in the past, but they have no interest in helping others, so that's not an option. There's no church to ask, as I spend my time at home 24/7 Caregiving & can't leave Mom long enough to get involved in a church.


I have talked to the Hospital staff and was told "sorry" but, that's the way it is. They don't have the staff or volunteers to help with this.


Should I just limit my visits to phone calls for most days? We talk 3 or 4 times a day on the phone when I'm not there.


How do other people handle things like this when they don't have any help from family or the extra money to always be paying people to do things for them?


Am going to try going very early in the mornings with the hope that the Handicapped spaces won't all be full but it's very unpredictable.

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Sounds like it's quite a long distance between your house and the hospital. You mentioned trying to get there earlier, which is a smart idea. I would expect Sunday is the busiest day of the week for visitors, so don't be discouraged. Maybe try Monday too?

You might also consider driving your car to a public parking location (like a Walmart or grocery store) and then taking a cab or an Uber from there to cut the costs. If the municipality in which the hospital is located has a program for transporting seniors or physically disabled people you may even be able to get a free ride!
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LavenderBear May 2022
They do have a Paratransport bus in our county, but it's only available to those who apply in advance. I'll go ahead and apply next week, but won't be able to use it until they check out all of my paperwork and get approved.

It'd be around $10 round trip which is cheaper than a taxi, so that is a good idea for the future.

I called the county before about it but was told I didn't qualify because I owned a car. We'll see if that's still true, because it was two years ago that I called.
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Duplicate post, please disregard.
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How much longer is your mom going to be in the hospital? If it's only for a short time more, I wouldn't worry about it as your mom is more than well aware of your physical condition. And the fact that you get to talk to her 3-4 times a day lets her know that you care about her and that she's not forgotten.
You can look into Trans Aid as they offer transportation services to the disabled and low income. But perhaps by the time you go through their application process, mom might already be out of the hospital.
You might want to also see if you might qualify for a free or low cost scooter of some sort, as that will come in handy for more than just going to see mom.
I hope your mom gets to come home soon. Blessings.
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LavenderBear May 2022
Thank you.
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Many hospitals have a free "Valet" service where someone will park your care and will get it back when you leave. Please ask about this service.
If it is not available I think, if you can, you should start sending emails and even letters to the management of the hospital . You can not be the only one that has run into this problem. You might just be a catalyst for a change that will enhance others lives.
Many areas have a Senior Service that has volunteers that will drive people to appointments. The one in my area you have to contact them 24 hours in advance.
Is there another area of the hospital that is not as used that would have more parking, and once in you could ask for a wheelchair.
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LavenderBear May 2022
You're correct, I'm definitely not the only one. Saw an elderly man with a Walker trudging along through the same parking lot across the street that I was in. He was struggling, too.

I have a neighbor that's unable to schedule surgery because she's alone & can't get a ride & a driver to stay with her for 24 hours afterwards without spending more than she can afford.
Guess that's quite common for single people.

it's a definite issue for people who don't have family in the area to help. Most people will never be aware of this because they have a son/daughter/niece/uncle etc to help them when they're stuck in similar circumstances.
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Lavender Bear (such a cute screen name!), I'm disturbed not only by the challenges you're facing, but by the lack of response from the hospital.   Who are you asking?  Nurses?   Nonmedical staff?  Admins?

I'm all for pushing for as much as I can get for family in need.    I would go beyond whatever level of staff advised you, and go straight for the Administrator, stating that you're in a dilemma and could use some support.  Then explain the situation.  It wouldn't hurt to sniffle a bit or even cry.

Don't ask for specifics; explain the dilemma and ask what the Admin can suggest as a solution, shifting the burden of help to her/him.  If she/he isn't interested, or is curt as apparently others have been to you, you might comment that you're sorry b/c you've gone to this hospital for years but next time around would have to go to one which has more support for compromised visitors.

Another thought:  in my area some hospitals have "chauffeur" service.   The person drives his/her car to the front entrance, and someone in the service will drive the car to a parking spot (usually a group of spaces reserved for this purpose), then retrieve the car for you.

Hospitals have either non or semi medical staff who transport patients; I even got  a free ride after my last hospitalization, even though I didn't need it.    This might be an option, i.e., the Administrator could arrange for someone to bring a wheelchair directly out to your car.   From what I've read, hospitals still face staffing shortages, but there might be volunteers who know how to handle vehicle exit to a wheelchair.  

Good luck; I hope you get some help, and please let us know if you do.
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LavenderBear May 2022
Thank you for your advice. Living in a rural area presents many challenges, as services that most people expect are unavailable.
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Great comments here. What interests me, and doesn't immediately help with your problem, is whether or not the hospital is abiding by the Americans with Disabilities Act. If I'm remembering correctly (and I may not be) a facility or business must have an adequate number of handicapped parking spots based on their regular traffic. I'm not suggesting that you pursue this as you have enough on your hands.

In addition, if you're able, and interested, and will be visiting your mother more than a few days, take a look at the cars parked in the handicapped parking. If they don't have a handicapped placard visible, ask the front desk to call security and have them ticketed or towed (probably only ticketed). Ask that security regularly check the handicapped parking spots. I realize that this is probably more than you want to do or are able to do.

I was at a medical building with my frail mother once. We had a handicapped placard. There were no handicapped spaces available. I finally found a place to park, left mom in the car, and checked the cars in the handicapped spots. Several did not have placards showing. I raised every kind of holy hell about it. They said they'd make sure security kept an eye on the problem. Did they? I don't know. But the next time we were there, we had no problem getting a handicapped spot.
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GardenArtist May 2022
Excellent insight!    There is abuse of handicapped parking spaces, unfortunately.
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I was at the Diner this morning and came out to find a car had parked in the handicapped area that has the blue stripes for van ramp accessibility and it wasn't because there were no spaces. No, did not tell the management but I have.

Are you on Medicaid for health insurance? If so, they provide transportation but you do need to apply. Call Office of Agingcand see if they have a list of volunteers willing to help people.

Don't you just love it. I bet if the tables were turned, you would help a neighbor. You may just have to scale down your visits. Mom should understand.
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LavenderBear May 2022
Yes, she understands. I'm going to visit by phone & try going early in the a.m. before the parking lot fills up.
That seems to be the most practical solution.
Thank you for your advice.
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I would rather space out the visits, or stop them altogether. The harm you cause to your knees is greater than the benefit of your hospital visits.
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LavenderBear May 2022
Thanks, that's what my Mom says too. She understands.
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You don't say which hospital staff you asked about this, but bear in mind that the League of Friends or whatever they call their volunteer supporters will have a separate structure from the actual employees. I should have a good rummage around on the website and see if there's a section for Visitors & Families or something like that. What you want is someone to pop out with a wheelchair and get you from parking lot into the hospital, yes? It shouldn't be beyond them; or they may even know of alternative transport.

Regarding the taxis, do you know what the charge is?

How long do you think your mother will be in hospital?
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LavenderBear May 2022
Thanks, I checked out their website. Like they told me at the Hospital, they're lacking volunteers right now. They're not going to be able to assist me. They have a request out for volunteers on their site.

I did ask about wheelchair assistance, but it's only available once I'm inside the building. And, they did not have a volunteer available to push me. I was able to borrow a wheelchair the other day to go up to the room but had to maneuver it myself and I felt like I was in the way of all the staff dashing thru the hallways.

That's okay, though. I'll just have to handle it on my own. Don't know how long she'll be there, as communication is also lacking there with the staff. At least they're treating her nicely and are kind to her. She understands my limitations.
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I don’t have a solution for the immediate problem, but I will suggest a tool that might give you more independence if you can find a way to get one.

My Mom had a three wheeled foldable scooter called a travelscoot. It breaks down into three pieces, with the largest one folding like a three spoke umbrella. Each of these pieces is much, much easier to load into a car trunk than a wheelchair.

The price will probably intimidate you at first, but they are occasionally available used on eBay, etc.

Other devices are also available, but this is the one that I know can work with any car.
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Uber and Lyft are generally cheaper than taxis.

Check into valet parking at the hospital.

Some areas have scooter rentals for 1 day and the scooter gets dropped off to site you designate.
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The hospitals in my city have valet parking at no charge. Is that an option for your mom's hospital?

Call the guest services department at your hospital to see if they can come up with a solution. Some locations have golf carts that circle the parking lots to get visitors to the entrance.

Good luck to you and I hope your mom gets better soon.

I suggest you look through your insurance options and get a smaller wheelchair that will fit in your car.
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Even if you are not a member, many churches have members that will fulfill a need. I encourage to contact ministers of churches near the hospital and ask if someone would be willing to drive you between the church parking lot and the hospital entrance.

The local (to the hospital) Area Agency on Aging may also be able to find someone to assist on a fairly short time frame.

Many communities have people who are willing to help but the challenge is making them available to the people who need the help. Most of them will have some affiliation to an organization of volunteers: a church, volunteer fire department, a food pantry, a senior center... please don't hesitate to contact them because you are not a member or their core service target. Many may tell you they can't help but you may still find the assistance you need from these groups.
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