My dad lives alone and gets lonely. Had a fall and is currently in a transitional facility to get stronger. He's confused about why he is there and denies falling. He has no short term memory. My brother and his family are visiting in multiples. Tonight there were 7 people in his little room. They are boisterous people with good intentions. They think this is stimulating for him. Is family chaos OK or should I ask them to keep the group size smaller in visits?
My loved one in AL no longer falls, is better fed, well cared for, mind is sharp.
Friends, social activity can be found in Assisted Living, people their age.
We're the rowdy family visiting when he was lonely, at home? Maybe these are guilt visits?
maybe just bite your tongue if its not too much longer.
I would hate to be the one to tell family to be quiet or to come with less people. idk some people freak out when you politely ask.....
~~BUT I do agree with you. people with dementia can be overwhelmed pretty quick~~
(my mom would never say she was overwhelmed,but I can tell by her facial expression)
maybe you could say you heard the neighboring rooms have very sensitive ears and everyone needs to 'hold it down' a little ?
or say you need a break and if everyone could come two at a time each day. so its spread out?(does that make sense)
sometimes in big crowds, everyone ends up talking to each other and the old person gets left out. because there is no "one on one" :(
healthy, and suddenly show up at the hospital to visit--drives me NUTS.
Having just done 2 hospital stays with DH after 2 heart attacks--people could visit, but wow, did I discourage it. He was mostly asleep and sometimes they'd wake him up...and he was so grouchy and ill.
A card, an email or text..that's all he cared about. Random visitors filling his tiny hospital room was not fun nor relaxing at ALL.
Personally, other than IMMEDIATE LOVING FAMILY who are a part of my daily life, I don't want to see or talk to ANYONE when I'm down.
You may want to consider an AL. Your Dad needs more care than independent living.
You know the person better. And with dementia it can be overwhelming. I know that the older I get, I find that one on one is better for me.
My Mom's nursing home has private dining rooms that the family can "reserve" for 2 hours or so. We have reserved both the small 4-person "Parlors" and the larger "Family Dining Room" for meals or get-togethers with Mom. There are also "Alcoves" that have sofas and soft chairs where people can gather. When we visit Mom, we limit each visit to 2-3 hours and then return later in the day for another 2-3 hours after our Mom has had a nap or some "down-time". Check with your Dad's facility and see if they have "Family Rooms" where residents can visit with large groups of family or friends.
Watch your Dad's facial expressions and behaviors, when he starts to look tired, gets upset /frustrated / more confused; or if he attempts to leave the room to get away from the visitors, that is time for the visitors to leave (for now.) They can always come back later in the day.
See All Answers