My 93 year old mom with significant dementia has one helper who is successful at getting her out for car rides, going through the drive through, etc. Sounds good but lately it seems like she then has a rougher rest of the day. I understand the stress of getting out and being in a new environment. Should I tell the helper to stop taking her out?
I wouldn't just assume that the helper should "stop taking her out." Find something that works that doesn't stress your mom out. Maybe there's a specific place she likes to go? Maybe its as simple as walking to the mailbox? Maybe tea on the front porch while watching the birds?
My point is... I think it's great that you have a caregiver who's willing and able to get your mom out for a bit! Work with your caregiver to find something that is truly enjoyable for your mom while your mom is still willing and able to try. A comfortable routine is important, but the trick is in finding what works. :-)
I'm sorry that she has a tough time after her drives. I would try a few things, like napping right after she gets back. But if it ruins her day, the ride has no value.
Bless you all.
My mom is in the stage where she likes a short car ride and an ice cream cone, but does not handle a family get together at my house very well. She gets confused and wants to go back to her apartment.
He enjoyed walking through Sam's Club and Costco. Both have wide aisles and large carts for him to easily walk. (I would leave his usual walker in the car)
But when it got difficult to get him into the car safely and out safely I stopped taking him out.
I know he still would have enjoyed the ride but his safety was first.
Same with your mom if there is anything that is upsetting to her, a change in the routine or if it becomes unsafe the rides have to stop.
Can she take her for a walk? A ride in a wheelchair? Just getting out for a few minutes might help.
(If you are in a cold area and if she is using a wheelchair don't stress about putting on a coat the "usual" way, put it on backwards so the opening is in the back. This will protect her torso, chill is blocked by the back of the chair and a throw over the lap and legs will keep her warm enough for a quick walk)
Bottom line is ...you are the employer, if you don't want mom out for rides because it stresses her out and you have to deal with the fall out later then tell her no more rides, end of discussion.
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