I've always known my sister was selfish. Especially when it came to mom. There's only a 15 month age difference between us,I'm the youngest.. We grew up struggling and watching our mother make sacrifices. My sister is the mother of 12 (ex was a jerk). . Doctors wanted to treat mom for Alzheimer's and/or dementia. Recently she was finally diagnosed with depression. Mom is also suffering mentally. I'm upset with way to much for this space. My sister has flat out refused to help in mom's care. Only one of her children help and i have to pay him. I work seasonal for 2 1/2 months a year. Each time its a struggle. I was shown the door the other day when I told her I had to bring mom over in the morning. We showed up and no one answered or opened the door. She is forcing me to quit or get fired. She told me she raised her children already , she wasn't going to do it.. I told her I care for mom 310 days. I don't see why she can't do it for less...She just wants moms property.
I also think, that if your Mom is able to, she should be paying you for her care. Also, stop paying the darling grandson and have a paid caregiver come in to help once and awhile to give you a break. (it's $19. per hour here...well worth it!)
If you haven't done so already, get Power's of Attorney for both medical and financial. As far as the property is concerned, can it be sold to help pay for her care? If she has a house, sell it or do a reverse mortgage so extra income will be coming in. (remember, though, there is a 5 year look back period on many assets if she should ever need a Medicaid facility) It is funny how seniors will hold onto property and other assets when they should be spending it on themselves and not leaving if for greedy relatives (ie: your sis and her hoard.)
Look at it this way, if your income declines because you are forced to quit your job, where will your mother go?
Get some advice from a good elder counselor...so you know your rights. Then write the sister off...she is just dead wood to you.
Good luck...I know how stressful these things can get....believe me!!! Sounds like you had a good mother who sacrificed for her children.
Lilli
hope u can find a daycare center for elders . maybe hire someone tocome and care for her while u work ?? iknow it cost money but its time that u do something about it cuz sis is washin her hands off of this ordeal . ck see if her ins or mediacid or whatever she has will help u out in anyway ?? if ur mom could pay you the same amount of money u make at work maybe u could resign and stay home and look after her ?
thats what pa did and i quit my job , i dont miss my job one bit ! i love my pa and he is worth it !
god bless you and wish u the very best .