My brother recently moved out with his girlfriend. Since he moved out with her it appears that everything to do with taking care of our dad will be left up to me. My dad has a home, which I do live in with him along with my nephew, that is in need of many repairs. My brother is a carpenter by trade, but has not kept up on the maintenance of the home. When he does come to the house he has his girlfriend drop him off and he comes in like we should be excited to see him. I wish I could be more excited. We used to be best friends as well as siblings. Now if he comes over I find myself going over the top asking why he even bothers to show up. He works and is paid good money. We made a "deal". He would go to work, I would take care of dad and he would help pay the bills. Since he has moved out, he has not offered anything to help financially. I hate fighting with him and I hate the anger I feel. His girlfriend owes my dad money and acts like it is no big deal to her. If I bring it up my brother tells me to shut my mouth and we have come close to fist fights!!!! I am too old to fight, but I will be damned if I will welcome her into the home if she cannot even acknowledge the fact she owes the money. My brother's excuse now is that he works hard all day and needs his rest. He won't bring his girlfriend, therefore, he won't come. Then in the end he tells me I am just "Little Miss Perfect" and should just see it from his eyes because I cause problems with him and his girlfriend. Oh well.....I am probably rambling as usual. I thank everyone for the support.....at least I know I am not the only one who tries and still gets kicked in the teeth?????
Both of my parents have passed now, and I feel proud of what I did to help them. I still treat my siblings like people I know and don't expect things to be as they were, some of them have become friends and some have not, and the anger is pretty much gone. They just can't understand since they haven't been in my shoes. They just thought I was playing the vicitm...etc...
This forum has gave me the support I wish I had from my family, the people here understand the emotional toll caregiving takes on us. It will gave me the strength to deal with my siblings choices.
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