Are you sure you want to exit? Your progress will be lost.
Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
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V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
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The short answer is you can't. He won't be convinced; you will either need to move in or move him out against his wishes, when that time comes. Or it has to be his idea to start with.
I wholeheartedly approve of trying to help Dad with his loneliness and his depression.
Moving is a pretty drastic solution to those problems. What less dramatic attempts have you made? Is there a senior center he could go to? A senior bowling league to join? A special discount during certain times of the day at a local golf course? Could he volunteer at a library? Get a part time job as a bagger at a lovely grocery store? There must be a lot of things he could do to be around other people than hang out with you all day.
But treating the depression should really come first. People who are depressed tend to isolate themselves. Depression is a real illness and there are real treatment plans for it. I can pretty confidently predict it will not be cured by a move, unless there is also a treatment plan in place. Convincing you dad to see a doctor might be a good use of your time.
Your profile says you are caring for someone with dementia. What is that situation, and how would it relate to Dad's move?
Pam, I had to chuckle when you wrote "aggravation keeps them alive"... how true that is.
The simplest of things can keep my parents talking for hour on end between themselves. Like if something is out of place in the neighborhood, the stories my parents will come up with, like a truck in a neighbor's driveway.... maybe the neighbor is moving... wonder if the son is moving back home.... did the son lose his job.... maybe the son got divorced.... how will the neighbors see the grandkids.... etc. You get my drift :)
Let me say, as an aging parent, you cannot convince him. A man's home is truly his castle. If you want to help him, hire a housekeeper to come in once a week, or a cook on MWF (leftovers on TuThuSat). Hire a grass cutter once a week. Take him out to dinner on Sundays. Yes, he will complain about them, but he would complain even if it was you. Aggravation keeps them alive.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
Moving is a pretty drastic solution to those problems. What less dramatic attempts have you made? Is there a senior center he could go to? A senior bowling league to join? A special discount during certain times of the day at a local golf course? Could he volunteer at a library? Get a part time job as a bagger at a lovely grocery store? There must be a lot of things he could do to be around other people than hang out with you all day.
But treating the depression should really come first. People who are depressed tend to isolate themselves. Depression is a real illness and there are real treatment plans for it. I can pretty confidently predict it will not be cured by a move, unless there is also a treatment plan in place. Convincing you dad to see a doctor might be a good use of your time.
Your profile says you are caring for someone with dementia. What is that situation, and how would it relate to Dad's move?
The simplest of things can keep my parents talking for hour on end between themselves. Like if something is out of place in the neighborhood, the stories my parents will come up with, like a truck in a neighbor's driveway.... maybe the neighbor is moving... wonder if the son is moving back home.... did the son lose his job.... maybe the son got divorced.... how will the neighbors see the grandkids.... etc. You get my drift :)
Yes, he will complain about them, but he would complain even if it was you. Aggravation keeps them alive.