I have been trying, for 2 weeks, to get mom to see a doctor about a red, swollen, oozing bump on her knuckle. She refuses to go and keeps saying that she'll put unguintine on it or it will go away on its own. I explained that it's not a good idea to put anything on it until we find out what it is. I even sent pictures of the finger to a (highly experienced) RN friend of mine who gave some suggestions; one of which is to see an MD about it. Still, she won't go. I made an appointment for her and when told of this, she said, the SAME thing, she doesn't need to go to a doctor. It will go away on its own. She also said, in a childish/threatening way, that she will cancel the appointment. I am at the end of my rope! Should I just let it go and "hope" that it isn't serious and see what happens?
If your RN friend had some other suggestions, give them a try.
Also, perhpas she would go for a routine visit? You can tell her that the insurance company called and she has to have a screening for something or other.
How advanced is your mom's dementia? This sort of unreasonableness is pretty typical, in my experience with my mom. Their ability to reason is no longer functional.