My ALZ Dad, 90, has been verbally creeping up on being sarcastic and demeaning for the past couple of weeks. While it seems to occur more when he is asked to do something he doesn't want to, like showering, it's increasing.
I've tried to look for any root cause and don't see any. But yesterday, at his neurologist's appointment, he cut loose a string of insults because I told the Doctor I was having a problem getting him to shower more. Luckily, the Doctor defused him but the complete lack of reasoning was present, a dark sarcastic responses were mocking the doctor and a "grew up in the Depression and woman are best at cooking" attitude are making his sarcasm hurtful and as a stronger woman, listening to this kind of sexist talk makes me grit my teeth. But to anyone's knowledge, does this verbal abuse cycle, become constant, depends what side of the bed they wake up from? As mentioned, it's only began the past couple of weeks, but it's almost visible when he's "brewing."
I'm trying to brace myself mentally and emotionally for the worse of ALZ, but I admit, he hurt the feelings and was so embarrassed at his behavior yesterday. I don't want to build a wall around my feelings to him, but I fear I may have to. Any suggestions?
another member posted this earlier. It’s a good article for what you are going through.
I hope it helps. And it’s good it happened with the doctor so he can see what you are dealing with. A mild anxiety med might help for when your dad has to be in a position he finds threatening.
https://www.aplaceformom.com/blog/11-12-15-elderly-dementia-outbursts/
It takes practice, but it can be done. I've been practicing for years, but it still stings sometimes!