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Back in January I posted about my now 92 year old Dad having a car accident with some confusion. He did have a UTI, and at first he improved with antibiotics. But he continues to be on a steep decline. He still has some confusion and memory issues that aren’t connected to a UTI but he scored 25 on the MMSE and his confusion usually clears up pretty fast. The most concerning thing is how much he sleeps. He goes to bed at 8 pm and sleeps until 9 am. But he then naps, or gets back in bed, for hours throughout the day. Only gets up to eat or go to the bathroom. Some days are better than others, but most days are like I described. All of his vital signs and blood work are great, so there is no obvious physical problem. And the physical therapist says he is very strong for his age. He just says he doesn’t feel good. He also has really let himself go from a hygiene perspective, shaving only once a week and rarely showering. It’s like he is too tired to do it. He was always a very active man and it is hard to see him wasting away like this. Any ideas what might be going on? I know depression is part of it, but could this be the start of the dying process?

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Part of aging. My own father was like this and he said he honestly wished he could just "go". He tried for my Mom to get up, to eat, and etc. But he was basically feeling done with life, exhausted, and wanted only peace and rest. He was wonderful talking about it, and if you allow a person to express how they feel they will often share with you. As a nurse so many patients expressed the "tired of life and ready to go" to me, and told me they could not tell family because family couldn't hear it, wouldn't listen and tried to argue with them. That is a real shame I always thought.
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FargoDan Mar 2021
Thanks for the reply. Yes, he talks a little more openly to my aunt about his feelings. I do think he is dwelling on the end of life. My Mom died about 5 years ago and I’ve heard him in the past, before he declined, say at her grave that he would see her soon. So I know it is on his mind.
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My dad slept a lot also. I agree with Alva that it is part of aging.

My mom is 95 and dozes off constantly.
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I am so sorry for what your going through. I am also a caregiver. Be glad your dad can at least sleep. Its so hard to see our parents change like this. I always heard that as we age we go back like infants and infants sleep a lot. Hang in there. You are doing a great job. Is he on an antidepressant?
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FargoDan Mar 2021
Thanks for the reply. Yes, he takes a daily antidepressant. He told me once he likes to sleep because I think he has some pretty active dreams. In fact, that is another symptom that is tied into his confusion. He sometimes wakes up and thinks the dream is real. That usually fades pretty quickly, but I get the feeling he likes sleeping because the dreams are more interesting than real life.
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