My Dad has Parkinson's disease. He lived by himself, but he is right next door to me. He has not bathed in over a year. He doesn't leave the house, open a window, or anything. All he eats is junk food. He will not bathe, even when offered help, or a shower chair. He won't even wash up! He changes his clothing once a month if even then. He has crusty peeling skin all over. He continually gets pink eye from not being clean. My most recent concern is that his feet are a purplish color. I told him to speak to his doctor about it, and he refuses. I know having him checked for depression will be a suggestion, but he is so stubborn that he would never allow it. I am concerned for his health and well being, but what can I do if he won' do anything or let me help him.
Sadly the only way for him to get medical care is if he falls or something else happens where you need to call 911 and he goes to the hospital.
You mentioned all he eats is junk food.... how does he get that food? Does he drive himself to the grocery or do you get his groceries for him?
Any ideas!?!
Depending on his health insurance [time for an American NHS!], you might be able to have a nurse visit him at home and assess his immediate health needs.
That would be a first step that you could initiate. The sooner the better.
Not all 'junk' food is actually 'junjk,' but do talk to your bnropther about a balanced diet for your dad.
You don't say how old your Father is, but respect his wishes as much as possible whilst taking care that his self-neglect [frequently due to depression of despair] is not bringing his health down any faster then Parkinson's does.
Make Dad comfortable and happy. Do not be hypercritical, do not display your anger, frustration, etc. He needs kind words and consolation for what life has taken from him.
Caregiver 99 - former psychiatric, medical, and surgical nurse, now caregiver for my aging AKA wide 78.
If it is serious enough they may be able to at least get him into a Dr or have one come and visit.
In Colorado they have a place called the Seniors Hub in my area, or you could check with Alzheimer's association if you suspect dementia...which is quite possible.
With my mom we suspected depression for years, then we came to find out that she had Alzheimer's and frontal lobe dementia.
It would seem to me that if he has Parkinson's he would be required to have regular Dr's visits, plus the purple feet maybe be a sign of issues due to diabetes if he is carbing out with the sugar.
Maybe take pictures of his situation and his feet to send to a health organization or his Dr and explain what is happening and you need advise for intervention.
I experience deep depression at times and it is possible that he is in a seriously deep depression, but even then he needs medical attention if it's last this long and is causing health concerns.
Deep depression does alter a persons ability to make appropriate choices.
This is my opinion, but you really need to do what you feel is best.
an old experienced geriatric nurse practitioner...yes a nice geriatric exam center would be nice to see if hydrocephalus, dementia, or just pain stubbornness is the situation. If they have lived this long doing what he has been doing who are we to change him if he is content. Sorry I know you must love him and want him around, but he at this point is the person making the calls. Think about a living will, and advance directives. Guardianship of person and finances.
your attitude with me would get you 2 black eyes and i mean simultaniously . thats how a pissed off 4 year old rolls .. what a condescending attitude . im sorry for your unfortunate patients ..
When my Mom was in her 90s and I visited her, I fed her trifle, tripe, and whatever else she wanted. She wasn't going to live forever but she did enjoy feeding her sweet tooth.
I pity anyone that is cared for by those afraid to let the elderly have a bit of what they fancy.
Wait till you get old and see how your wants and needs are catered for. I do hope they let you have a bit of what you fancy. Life in old age can be bad enough without some tyrant preventing you from having a doughnut when you feel like one.
Old people like fun things too. Treats are not reserved for the young.
I have eaten NH food, and it might not be up to Gordon Ramsey';s standard, but it is prepared according to dietary standards determined by professionally qualified dieticians and as far as I know it hasn't proved fatal yet.
Go on. Spoil us oldies while you still can. We won't last forever, you know.
Just to protect yourself, I'd call around, get their names, dates, and what was said when you explained the situation. I knew my dad had pneumonia. But he refused to go to the clinic/ER. I was stressing because I didn't want him to die here at home. I called the clinic, the APS, went down in person to an elder law attorney and then his medical insurance. In the end, they all told me that if he doesn't want to live, and he doesn't want to go the clinic, then there's nothing I can do. I just have to accept his wishes. Pshaw!! Until he dies, and then I get arrested for elderly abuse. So, my advice is to call everyone, get their names, date, time you spoke to them. And keep it in a safe and quick access if you need it. Proof that you tried to get help for him. I wish you well on overcoming these particular problems.
FYI, if he doesn't clean himself or change clothes, one doesn't know if he has sores in his body. If he has sores, this can fester, become infected, and then die from it. When my mom spent a month at the hospital, they didn't change her pamper as often as I did. when she came home, her back and private areas were super red. She flinched just having water touching it. So, if your dad's wearing soiled clothes, I would think he has rashes on him.