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Your mother and brother are both mentally sick people, and obviously have a very dysfunctional co-dependency on each other, and it is now in your best interest to stay as far away from them as possible.
Why you would have moved back in with your mother to begin with is beyond me.
For your own mental health's sake, please stay away from both of them and get yourself into some much needed therapy.
You at this point in your life owe your mother and brother NOTHING, and neither will ever change, so quit holding out hope. Time to be realistic and know that the only person you can change is yourself, so start today by cutting your ties from your dysfunctional family and move forward towards a more healthy you and life.

I will leave you with one of my very favorite sayings....."Never be a prisoner of your past. It was just a lesson, not a life sentence."
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MiaMoor May 27, 2024
Great words to live by.
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You are not alone. My mother made a mess of things raising us. I am 6 years older than my twin sisters. One was the golden child because she possessed the traits my mother valued and the other was the black sheep who couldn’t do anything right. I just got screamed at a lot by our mother and raised to be the people pleaser.

Unfortunately my sisters’ relationship fell apart several years ago and I don’t think they will reconcile. They will not be in the same room together and will not talk to each other. and I act as the go between. I feel stupid enabling this behavior but there needs to be some communication between the three of us about our parents.

I blame my mother for a lot of the hard feelings and bitterness they have for each other. It’s a sad situation. I am going through the motions to fulfill what I believe are my obligations to my parents but I just don’t feel much for my mother anymore. Dealing with her in her old age has opened my eyes to who she is and it is not pretty.
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waytomisery May 22, 2024
You described me and my family as well . The people pleaser whose eyes were opened while caring for my manipulative abusive mother who would pit her 5 children against each other our whole lives . There is basically no family left . For the most part siblings have gone separate ways .
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Classic abuse Involving a narcissist . The Golden child and the Black sheep or scape goat . Stay away from these people . No One deserves to be screamed at . This is Really a form of Bullying and to make you Powerless as their target . I wouldn't give them any More energy or Power . Delete them out of your life - it isn't worth your time or energy to figure out idiots . Cut ties and Move forward . These people are Toxic .
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I’m alittle confused .
Your profile says you care for 92 yo Elbie. ???
You say Mom is 83 and takes care of herself and the family is dysfuctional , she shows favoritism for your brother since you were a child and now she and your brother are violent .

I am happy that you left her home .
Stay away and seek help from a therapist for your mental health. You can start by getting a check up from your PCP . Maybe they can recommend a therapist .

Favortism can happen at any age .
Stay away from abusive family . You can learn to live a better life without them.
Good luck .
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